Pregnant for a loser

Dear Pastor,

I am 22 years old and I am having my first child. The man who got me pregnant has fathered seven other children and he is only 30 years old.

He says that he wants to have lots of children. He is a hard worker. He is in sales. He says he meets new women every day and they all want to have relationships with him.

Some of the women are very lonely. Many of those who are married are always home during the day, and the single women are at home in the evening.

They are always looking for dates. He shows them how they can earn money and he calls them and takes them out. The women are anxious to go to bed with him because they believe that salesmen have money.

This guy drives a nice car. When I met him, I thought the car was his, but I found out after that he was driving a rental.

When he told me he didn't pay to service his car, I asked him how come. That is when he told me that the car was not his.

I recently graduate from college. He is a smooth talker, so that is one reason why he has so many children. But, he doesn't have the money to support the children.

I don't want this guy in my life anymore because he lied to me. He is still living at home with his parents. His mother does the washing and cooking for him, and she is 65 years old.

Pastor, I made a mistake and it is a big one. I could have been married to my childhood friend, who is now studying medicine.

He was the one who took my virginity, but he was the 'churchy' type of guy. Whenever I went to his house and I wanted us to make love, he had to be reminding me that we shouldn't.

Now, he doesn't want to see me at all. He said I don't have any ambition.

His mother loves me, and when I called her and told her that I was pregnant by another man, she said I should still come by and visit her. I hope you can say a word of comfort to me.

J.K.

Dear J.K.,

If you like to have sex so much and you felt that you had to have sex with this young man who got you pregnant, you should have had your supply of condoms with you.

I am sorry that you allowed carelessness to get the better of you. When this man told you he had seven children, that should have caused you to either tell him to go or to be very careful and protect yourself.

The young man who is in med school loved you and perhaps was looking to have a future with you, but you couldn't wait for him.

People who are involved in sales can indeed make a lot of money, but they have to work very, very hard; only foolish women would believe that the money they earn comes easily.

I hope you have learnt from your mistake; and I hope this man will support his child after you have given birth, and that you will go out and earn a living without depending on him or any other man.

Pastor