Boyfriend trying in vain to get me pregnant

Dear Pastor,

I am 27 years old. When I was 25, I became pregnant by a man of the law. He fooled me. I loved him so much. I would give him money every month when I got my pay.

I got pregnant, and I lost the baby. He did not believe that I had lost it. People told him that I aborted it.

Every time we had sex after I lost the baby, he would tell me to carry this one. After having sex with him, he would hold me down and tell me not to get up.

He would also say, "Lie down and sleep so that you will get pregnant." He used to search my phone and read all my messages.

I knew another guy who was in love with me, and I liked him, too. We used to meet and talk. Sometimes, he would come to my workplace and bring me lunch.

On my last birthday, we went out for a lunch date. He planned it properly so we could have lunch and have sex and I could get back to work without anybody suspecting anything.

I had two hours for lunch on my birthday. My boyfriend sent me flowers at my workplace. When the flowers came, I wasn't there, but the other workers took them for me.

My boyfriend didn't expect me to not be at work because he had called me in the morning. I knew I was taking a risk by going out with this other guy. But it's a risk I had to take.

When I went home that night, my boyfriend wanted to take me to Port Royal to eat fish, but I was not in the mood at all because I had eaten so much already. But I had to go.

I forced myself to have sex with him that night. Having sex with two different men in one day wasn't easy for me to do. I even lied by telling him how much I enjoyed it.

By the time he was finished with me, I was fast asleep. He had to wake me up the following morning to go to work.

This man has not been able to get me pregnant again, and I don't want to. Every day, he tells me to go to the doctor because I am sick. I told him that both of us should go together.

He doesn't want to go because, according to him he got me pregnant already.

Pastor, I am trying to go to Canada, but I don't want him to know about my plans. He may try to block me.

Y.L.

Dear Y.L.,

If you know that you do not love this man and you see no future with him, then you should make your plans to leav e Jamaica.

It is unfortunate that when you got pregnant by him, he accused you of having an abortion. You know you are not guilty of that, and to make it more difficult for you, he continues to accuse you. A wise man does not listen to what people say about his woman. He should not pay any attention to what people say about you if he loves you.

You say that this man constantly goes through your phone; he does so because he does not trust you. I wonder if you search his phone. He suspects that you have a boyfriend.

WHEN DID THE LOVE END?

From what you said, he is quite correct. The question is, when did you stop loving him? Was it when you lost the pregnancy or since he has been constantly har assing you about getting pregnant again?

This is a loveless relationship. You have another man in your life, and you have started to take some risks. Spending lunchtime with him in a hotel shows that you either want to become bad or you don't care about your present relationship.

So get out of his life as quickly as possible before he finds out that you are playing around with another man.

Jamaica is very small, and somebody is likely to see you during lunchtime at a hotel with another man.

Pastor