Boyfriend wants to get me pregnant before marriage

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you for your advice. I am 23 years old and I do not have a child. I have a boyfriend, but the relationship is on and off.

Sometimes I see him often, and sometimes for weeks, he does not show up. He is always with his mother. Sometimes I call him a mama's boy. The relationship he has with his mother is very close. But he gets upset when I call him a mama's boy. He doesn't talk much about his father. His mother's name is on his bank account. That doesn't bother me because I do not have his name on mine.

his mother's only child

I am a graduate of The University of the West Indies and so is he. He is the only child for his mother. I love him to death. He gives me whatever I ask for. He is not a mean man. He goes to his mother every day before going home. Whenever he wants me, he finds me. But he is demanding. Sometimes he would just call and tell me to come and that I must not plan to go back home.

Although I am not on his account, he tells me what is in it. He would like me to get pregnant before he marries me. I do not agree with that. I would like to do my master's degree before I get married. His mother and I get along very well. He is my second boyfriend. I don't want to leave him for any other man. What do you think of him?

F.L.

Dear F.L.,

I believe that you have a good man in your life. A man shouldn't be considered a 'mama's boy' because he is close to his mother. You ought to be happy that he thinks highly of his mother. You know that he doesn't have another woman in his life, so you don't have a challenge when it comes to that. He probably wants you to get pregnant before marrying you because he wants to be sure that you can get pregnant. Tell him that you don't have to become pregnant for him to marry you; a doctor could give him that assurance.

You are fortunate to have a man who doesn't ask you for money. So many men try to live off women. Such men are not good men. Hold on to your man and plan intelligently with him for the future. Happy New Year to you.

Pastor