Not sure if I want to marry my ex

Dear Pastor,

I am 50 years old and I have a big decision to make. I lived with a woman in Jamaica and we have two children, a boy and a girl. She left me to seek a better life overseas. Our two children live with my sister. She raises them as her own because she doesn't have children of her own. I figured that we may never get back together, but everything she did up there, she told me about it.

I got involved with a woman in Jamaica and I told her about it. I got her pregnant and I supported the child to this very moment.

let the children go

Now, Pastor, this woman got married in America and then divorced her husband. She is now coming back to Jamaica to marry me, and is hoping to take us to America. My children are excited. They want to meet their mother in person after many years. They also want to see mom and dad married. However, this other woman, who is my girlfriend, doesn't want me to go. Sometimes I tell myself that I would let the children go, and that I would stay here. There is another time that I tell myself that I should marry her and go overseas with her.

I was very careful not to have any more children. I could see my children getting into college in America. My daughter is always talking about medicine. My son would like to do engineering. This woman is going to be in Jamaica by August.

Pastor, as a man, help me. Tell me what I should do.

C.K

Dear C.K.,

This woman and yourself had an open relationship. Both of you informed each other about what you were doing. When you got the woman pregnant, you informed her. All along you knew that her plans were to come back to Jamaica and marry you, so that time is coming up. How can you now disappoint her by telling her that you are not going to carry out your side of the bargain?

It is unfortunate that you got involved with another woman and you impregnated her. However, your children's mother was always there reminding you of all the plans you all made. As I see it, you need to stand up as a man and you need to bear in mind that the future of all the children are important. You need to begin making plans to marry this woman.

I wish you well.

Pastor