I am desperate to get pregnant

Dear Pastor,

I have been married for three years. My partner and I do not have children. We are beginning to worry about that. My relatives and friends in our church keep asking us if nothing is happening.

We told them that they would see when something is happening. Even our parents ask us sometimes if something is wrong. They are eager for us to give them grandchildren. My husband told me that a member of his family says that I could be barren, so he should encourage me to go to the doctor and get checked out. I finally went to the doctor and he told me that nothing was wrong with me. I should have much fun as possible and when I am not worrying as much as I am now, I will get pregnant.

Sometimes my husband and I have sex twice in one night, and I know that he is hoping to get me pregnant. My husband has bought a crib and put it in the room where the child would sleep. The only thing he has not done as yet is to put the crib together. He is waiting to hear me say that I am pregnant. He is also hoping to hear that our first child is a boy.

Friends of ours, who were married after us, have already had their first child. One couple got married and six months later filed for a divorce. She told me that they had not even opened all of their presents.

I have put on a little weight since I got married. My husband told me that I should take off the weight because he did not know me as being fat when we just met. I have gone to the doctor and I have taken off the weight. My husband has gone to check out himself and nothing is wrong with him, either.

What do you suggest that we can do to have a child?

N.F.

Dear N.F.,

I would say to you, relax. Your doctor is correct. If the good Lord wants you to have a child, it will happen. Your husband needs to get rid of the crib; he is too anxious.

You mentioned that one couple who got married after you is now divorced. About 50 per cent of married couples get divorced. Couples do not spend enough time with each other, they only make time to have sex.

In the quest to get you pregnant, your husband is having sexual intercourse with you sometimes twice in one night; he is probably doing too much of a good thing. I suggest the next time you visit your doctor, you ask him about that.

The doctor has assured you that nothing is physically wrong with you that should prevent you from becoming pregnant. There is also nothing wrong with your husband. So continue to love each other and ignore all your relatives and friends who are eager to see you get pregnant, and who rudely suggest to your husband that you might be barren. They should mind their own business.

Pastor