STINKING ASSAULT - Woman mistaken for matey doused with faeces

A 20-year-old Hanover woman was arrested after she splashed watery faeces on two females at the Lucea Market in Hanover on Wednesday.

The incident happened moments after the doo-doo thrower accused one of the women of having an affair with her man. However, it appears that she was mistaken.

The police's Corporate Communications Unit said that shortly after midday, the accused, who hails from Bulls Bay, Hanover, was in the arcade section of the market when she saw two young women approaching. It is alleged that the young woman walked to the back of a shop and returned with a bag containing watery human faeces, which she threw on the woman she thought to be her 'matey', and her friend.

The police said that while carrying out the act, the woman repeatedly used the words "Cramp and paralyse, cut and clear". Bystanders say the doo-doo thrower said "You need fi lef mi man alone." It is understood that she said that she has been storing the mess for a long time, in anticipation of her matey passing by.

"Me seh di whole place stink a s&!t," one eyewitness told THE WEEKEND STAR. "It look like the woman did save up dat fi ova a month." The now soiled women reportedly retaliated and a fight ensued.

Bystanders ran to the nearby Lucea Police Station and alerted the cops. The lawmen were hardly able to catch their breath due to the foul stench emanating from the faeces. During their enquiries, it turned out that the woman accused of being the matey did not know the man in question.

The doo-doo thrower was arrested and the fire department was called in to wash the affected section of the market. Police said that they found a pair of scissors and knife in the brassiere of the attacker. She has been charged with assault occasioning bodily harm, assault at common law and possession of offensive weapons. She is booked to appear in the Lucea Parish Court on May 11.