Her double nipples shocked me

Dear Pastor,

I have a concern. I am 24 and a Christian. While attending university I met a girl and fell in love with her. We became close and studied together. We went out together but, as Christians, we decided not to have sex until we are married. So often we were tempted to have sex, but we made a commitment to each other to wait. We have gone close to having sex, but the furthest has been dry sex.

We are loved on each side. Her parents love me, I love them and my folks love her. Recently, we went to the beach and decided to mess around a little. I took off her swim- wear top and was shocked. It spoiled my day. I discovered she has double nipples and they are pronounced. I asked her why she did not tell me. She said she didn't think that would be cause of concern. She did not see it as important. I have touched her breasts before during dry sex, but I never felt them. I never told her to take off her bra when we played around.

Now that I know she has double nipples, I am not so excited about her anymore. I asked my parents what they thought about it. My mother told me that she knows of girls who have double nipples who had children, and it did not appear as if it bothered their men. My father did not have a comment except to express alarm.

My girlfriend has noticed the difference in my attitude towards her. She told me if I am unhappy with her, we can stop dating because she knows she is not ill, and I am trying to get out of the relationship. That is why I am asking for your advice. I will be looking for the answer in THE STAR.

R.W

Dear R.W.,

My understanding is that, "Extra nipples can be a birth defect of unknown cause or associated with rare genetic syndromes. About one in 10 people have an extra nipple, but most are small, misshapen, and mistaken for freckles or moles."

You seem to be concerned about your girlfriend's extra nipples because they are pronounced. From the tone of your letter, you believe her breasts are deformed. I can't say you need not be concerned. She is your woman and you would like to marry her. What I would suggest you do is to ask your woman to check this out with a medical doctor. You should accompany her to see the doctor to alleviate any doubt in your mind as to whether your woman is normal.

Your mother has told you she knows women who have double nipples, who have had children and their men seem not to be concerned about that. If you love this woman (and I believe you do), don't give her the impression you do not care. Work with her and treat her right. After all, only the both of you are likely to see her breasts and, of course her doctor from time to time.

I wish both of you well. Don't be hasty. You may never get another woman as sweet and lovely as her.

Pastor