My girlfriend wants to run a massage parlour

Dear Pastor,

I am a 35-year-old man and I am writing to you for your advice. I used to run around a lot, and have ended up having five children with four different women. It is not easy to support the children, but I am trying.

I have been going to church, but this girl who I met there doesn't believe that I have changed. The girl before her couldn't deal with me because I wanted to have sex with her every night. She said that I was only a pretender.

It is not hard for me to pay for what I want.

My present girlfriend believes that I love her, but she cannot deal with this hardcore behaviour of mine. I see nothing wrong with us looking at pornography and suggesting that we practice what these couples do. I don't believe in my woman wearing underwear when we are going to bed. At times we use expletives to each other, but in a loving way. My girlfriend used to beat the street and she still talks about who gave her the best sex in her life. She calls them by name, and she sometimes wants me to tell her who I didn't enjoy having sex with.

I want to change, but there are times I miss the old way of doing things. My girlfriend is not interested in doing an office job. She wants to run a massage parlour and she wants it in an upscale area. She knows she can get good clients and beautiful girls to work with her. I do not know what is the best thing to do. Sometimes my bills pile up on me and I say to my woman, 'Go and do your thing', and she brings home enough money for us to pay our bills. You may say that is not right, but a man has to do what he has to do to pay his bills.

Is it wrong to be a masseuse or to go into such business? I need to know what to do with my life and I can't be a hypocrite. I hope to hear from you soon.

Initials Withheld.

Dear ........,

Let's set this matter straight. There are some masseuses who are trained and are professionals. They run legitimate businesses and are not involved in any 'hanky panky'. There are others, however, who only use the name, but they are nothing but prostitutes. That is why from time to time police have raided these places and have closed them down.

Many girls from rural Jamaica have responded to ads in newspapers from persons offering jobs, and the girls found out soon after that what they had to subject themselves to was prostitution.

Your woman and yourself are interested in doing this sort of business. I am not here to condemn you, but I am not encouraging anybody who says he or she is a Christian to be a part of that type of work. I am not sure why you have not tried to get a legitimate work or encourage your girlfriend to leave the streets and to seek another type of job. She does not want to work in an office, but isn't there something else that she can do? Why does she want to sell her body?

I have met women who are involved in prostitution and they have told me that it is hard work, but from the way you talk, your woman does not see it as hard work. You seem to want to encourage her to continue to engage in it and to pimp out your woman.

Don't mix up Christianity with the type of work you want to do. The girl you met in church is quite right, you have not changed. You are still a worldly and ungodly person. I will not encourage you to try and open an illegal massage parlour and if your woman is not trained in that line of work, you should not encourage her to run one either. Please do not encourage young girls to get in that type of work when you know that you are encouraging them to get into prostitution.

Pastor