Will I find a man, although I have three kids?

Dear pastor,

My story is very long. I was a troubled teen. My dad died just before I began high school and my mom left us two years before. My sisters grew me. Put it this way, we grew each other. I am 29 years old and I am the youngest of three girls. We are all three years apart.

I was out of control. I became pregnant and dropped out of high school. My boyfriend stepped up when the baby was two years old. I forgave him for abandoning us. He proposed to me and asked me to move in with him. He runs his father's business; they are well-off people. Without much guidance, I moved in with him soon after I had another child by him.

This guy was a godsend in the beginning, until I started to see the real him. He cheats and he thinks that it is a woman's job to take care of the house and kids, and the man should do as he likes, as long as the kids have food, not even clothes but food. I didn't have anywhere to go. My sisters moved in with their husbands and children. My boyfriend kept making excuses why we can't get married. Yet he wants a lot of children and he doesn't spend time with them. My life took a turn for the worst when he started to abuse me in front of his other girlfriends. That was it for me.

I started university and I decided that when I get a job, I would take my kids and leave. His parents love me now, but then, they weren't fond of me at all. During my last year at college, I found out that I was pregnant with our third child. I graduated with distinction and I was pregnant for my professor. Everybody was shocked to discover that I was pregnant.

God has been good to me and my kids. I left my children's father and rented a

one-bedroom house. His parents hired me, so I used that little money to pay my bills and take care of my kids. My eldest child is now a teenager. Yes, I am a 29-year-old with a teenager. This guy is heartless. He loves his kids but he does little or nothing for them.

I am a nurse. But sometimes I feel like nothing. I wasted all my years with him, from high school until now. I still love him but I refuse to be used. He mocks me because he has moved in with his new woman and I am still single. I

sdedicated my life to Christ and my kids. Do you think I would ever find a good man, though I have three children? I have been baptised almost a year. I am just really sad and depressed about the state of my life and the way my children's father has treated me.

Please pray for my children and myself.

C.E.

Dear C.E,

I am curious to know what happened to the relationship you had with the professor. He got you pregnant. Did you terminate that pregnancy? Without question, you've had a rough time growing up. You became sexually active at a young age and your children's father has not treated you with respect. You know that you have made lots of mistakes but God has not given you up. I am glad that you went to nursing school and you are working. I am also happy to hear that you have become a practising Christian. You are concerned whether any man would want you as his wife after having three children. The answer is yes. I know women who have had many more children, and men who are not the children's fathers have married these women. Just trust the Lord and pray. Perhaps you should seriously consider taking the children's father to court, if you believe that he is not giving you enough financial support for the children. May the good Lord bless you. I hope you do not consider marrying the children's father, even if he tells you that he is a changed man.