Cheating on my boyfriend with a schoolmate

Dear Pastor,

I am having a secret relationship with a boy at my school. I want to tell my boyfriend about it but I don't know how to tell him.

I like the boy a lot but things aren't going so great for me and my current boyfriend. I tried telling him so many times that I want to break up with him but I can't.

I hate to see people in pain, and keeping this from him is hurting not only me but both of the boys. My boyfriend and I had sex once and he accidentally hurt me.

Now he's scared to touch me. I want to leave him. Pastor, please help me figure this out.

Unknown

Dear Writer,

What I can tell you is that I figure out that you are probably in your early teens, and that you have become sexually active at an early age.

Now you regret doing so because it is not only one guy you have in your life, but there is this guy that you call your secret lover.

You know that if you were to tell the man you call your boyfriend that you are in a secret relationship, he may beat you up or pick fights with the other fellow.

You are in no condition to have relations with these young men. I don't know for sure what you mean when you say that you don't like to see anybody get hurt and that is the reason why you have not told your boyfriend that you are having a relationship with the other guy.

You need to come to your senses and realise that your boyfriend wouldn't think much of you at all if he were to find out that there was another man in your life.

One of these days he may find out and curse you and call you a little whore, because that is how men see women who have more than one man.

Mark you, I want you to understand that I am not saying that you are a bad girl, but he would consider you bad. Girls who play around with more than one man get hurt.

Many do so for money. Others foolishly do so for popularity because their friends, who are bad, tell them that it is a game they should learn to play.

If you want to have a boyfriend, it should only be one. But you said this guy hurt you, so it might be better for you to end the relationship with both men.

I don't believe you want them to consider you a bad girl, but you are setting up yourself for them to see you as one. I wish you well. Thanks for writing. Do so again.

Pastor