Caught my friend giving my dad oral sex

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem. I turn to you because I am so upset with my friend. I am 19 years old and she is 18. We are very good friends. We go out together.

I am the only child for my parents. My mother is away, and I am living with my father. He is 62 years old.

This girl got along with my father very well. Sometimes she would stay with us. We cook and eat and she is just like my sister.

I did not know that she had eyes on my father. That never came to my mind. One day I went home and I caught my friend having oral sex with my father.

My father was flat on his back without any clothes on and she did not have any clothes on either. They didn't even hear when I came in; she was so taken up with what she was doing.

I shouted to her and she jumped up. My father asked, "How come you came home so early and you could have knocked?"

This girl went into the bathroom and locked herself in, and wouldn't come out of the bathroom. My father told her to open the door and he would give her something to put on.

He gave her a pair of shorts. I was so angry with my father. He told me that I should remember that my mother was away and he needed somebody sometimes.

I told my father that I did not expect him to go with my friend. I told her that I believed she wanted to rip off my father.

She always said that she wanted a man who could give her money. My father is an independent man and sometimes he gives her money to help her.

Pastor, imagine me seeing my father and this girl having oral sex? My father begged me not to tell my mother. He is extra nice to me.

But every time I come home, it is like I am seeing this girl and him having sex. I am not going to tell my mother, but this girl can never be my friend again.

I still love my father. But I wouldn't trust him with any of my girlfriends.

B.S.

Dear B.S.,

I am sure you felt shocked to see your father and your friend having sex. You will never consider her as a good friend anymore. But I am going to ask you to forgive your friend.

You said she loves money. So evidently, your father was a target, perhaps vulnerable in the sense that she knew that he liked her and he would have given her anything that she asked for. To have sex with him was easy.

It was not right for her to become sexually involved with your daddy. On the other hand, I hope that you would forgive your father.

And I hope that you would not tell your mother what you have witnessed. That may cause a big rift in the family, and you would not want to see that.

I hope your mother will not stay away from your father for any long period. Remember the excuse he gave to you for getting involved with your friend? He said your mother has been away.

Of course, he should have exercised self-control, but he didn't. I want you to tell your father that you have forgiven him, but it will be hard for you to trust him, but you will try.

Pastor