Convinced my lover is pregnant

Dear Pastor,

I am in my late 20s and I am an avid reader of your column. I have a girlfriend who is 23. At this time, I am sure she is pregnant, but she does not want to admit that I am the one who got her pregnant.

She said that I am not responsible for the pregnancy, but I know why. I come from a poor background and she does not want her friends to know that I am the one who got her pregnant.

She prefers to lie and say that it is one of the guys at her workplace that got her pregnant.

This is my first child and I don't want her to throw it away. She used to tell me that we could go out but she couldn't introduce me to her parents.

We used to have sex every week, but the only time we did not use a condom (because I ran out), I got her pregnant.

Do you think that I should demand that she go to the doctor and find out if she is pregnant? These days when I call her, she is not answering. I am a hard worker and I want my child.

I was hoping to settle down with this girl. But she does not appreciate the love I have for her. I should have known that she was not what she was pretending to be.

Her parents thought that she was a princess but from the time I touched her, I realised that she had other men in her life.

I asked her and she admitted that she had five different men with whom she had sex. I still loved her. Now I don't know what to do because if she is pregnant, I want to be the father of the child.

Please tell me what to do.

B.C.

Dear B.C.,

Quiet yourself. Use common sense. You believe that you have impregnated this young woman. She has not told you so, but you are just running up your mouth that you got her pregnant. You are fortunate that she allowed you to have sex with her.

Now you are making the world know that. You are not a wise young man. You should keep yourself quiet and stop embarrassing the young woman.

You know that when the relationship started she was reluctant in allowing you to meet her parents. Now if she is pregnant and she says that you are not responsible for the pregnancy, stop making yourself a fool and leave her alone.

Time will tell whether or not she is pregnant and if the child is yours. You are not a good man because this woman told you that she had sexual relations with five other men and you have to mention it.

Shame on you; that was something that was said to you privately and you should not repeat that. You repeated it because you want to shame this girl.

Pastor