Babyfather trying to spoil my child’s future

Dear Pastor,

I am 31 years old and I got married several months ago. I have a child but it is not for my husband. The father of the child did not 'own him' when he was born.

I was 20 years old at that time. I had a hard time providing for my child. My sister and brother tried to help me but we are all poor people. I got involved with men to support myself and my child.

But I refused to go into any long-term relationship with them because I told myself that I did not want men to use me and dump me, as my child's father did.

I decided to take him to court and he threatened me, so I got scared and did not bother to take him to court.

I got a work in a hotel and one of the guests saw me and liked me. I told him that it was against the rule for workers to date guests. He gave me his number and told me to call him. He was at the hotel for one week with others.

I did not call him but every time he saw me, he asked why I did not. After he left the hotel, we became very good 'phone friends'. He asked me if I would love to visit him in the US and I told him that would be impossible because I did not have a visa.

He asked me to send pictures and I did, not only of myself, but my son.

He was very kind to me. After eight months, he told me he would love to come back to Jamaica but this time it was to come and see me. I told him not to plan to stay at the hotel that I worked because I did not want to break the rules.

He rented a cottage; we became very close after he got here and he offered to marry me. But his divorce was not yet finalised.

After his divorce was finalised, he came back to Jamaica and we got married. Since I got married to this man, the people in the area think I am rich and everybody is looking to me for money.

My husband is filing for me and I am planning to take my son with me. I have not said a word to his father about taking my boy.

He saw me on the street and said that he heard that I will soon leave Jamaica, but I must remember that I can't take his child away from him.

I am leaving my child with him, he does not give me a cent to support him and I do not have to go to men and have sex with them to get money. My husband sends me enough.

So Pastor, do you think my son's father can stop me from taking my son with me?

D.S.

Dear D.S.,

I suggest that you speak to an immigration lawyer. I am not a lawyer, but as far as I am aware, the biological father of your son may have to give consent for you to take your son with you. So I repeat, kindly talk to an immigration lawyer.

I am glad that you have got married to a man who is taking very good care of you. Make sure you are faithful to this man and I hope that the child's father will not prevent you from taking your son with you. I wish you all the best.

Pastor