Don’t have any luck with women

Dear Pastor,

I am a 25-year-old male from Hanover. I am currently in a relationship but I feel alone. My first relationship was at the age of 23 and since then I've been hurt so many times, whether by cheating or otherwise. I've been through a lot, to the point where I even had to seek counselling for nine months. Recently, during my current relationship, I told my partner about my past and she still hurt my feelings. Eventually, she came around. We had sex, and then it felt like I was alone again. She has shown no interest, ignores my messages and, at times, she finds an excuse for not talking to me. All I really want is someone who is real to me. She must be loyal and wants to settle down, that's all I have ever wanted. But my friends said to me that it's better I just 'cut and go through', as Jamaicans would say, but it's hard. I'm not that type of person.

I.P.

Dear I.P.,

I hate to tell you that women are going to take advantage of you because you are not behaving as a man, and you think that by having sex with them, that will bring you happiness.

Perhaps you think too highly of yourself. A woman can have casual sex with a man but that does not mean she loves him, and you can have sex with a woman and not be in love with her. Having sex does not necessarily mean that you are committed to that person, and I believe that part of your problem is that you feel that because these women have allowed you to have sex with them, that they love you. A woman may have sex with a man and behave as if she loves him, but she may do so because she wants his money. Evidently, you don't mean anything to these girls and that's why they go to other men. You consider them to be cheating. In the truest sense of the word, they are not cheating. They are just pretending that they love you and making a fool of you and using you. Find a genuine counsellor who would spend time with you and teach you how to deal with women.

Pastor.