My soldier boyfriend wants to get married

Dear Pastor,

I have been reading your column for many years and I have seen how much you have helped people both young and old. I hope you can help me. I have a decision to make. I have a boyfriend in Kingston and I really love him. I do not have a bad word to say about him. Whenever I go to Jamaica, I spend time with him. I get along very well with his parents. He is in the military and he wants to make a career out of it, so he tells me that I will have to come home if we are to get married. However, I do not want to come home and I do not want our relationship to end.

He is a very hard-working man. I would like to settle down and have children before I am 30 years old. I am writing you for your advice. Returning to Jamaica is out of the question for me. I cannot ask him to give up his career.

What kind of guidance can you give me?

B.S.

Dear B.S.,

At present, you see this as a big problem but I am being advised that there are many people who are in the military whose spouses are living abroad, and they come to Jamaica and spend time with their partner and then return.

It is not really a big issue. It might not be ideal that many have remained faithful to their spouses and their relationships have survived. If this man loves you, and you love him, both of you can get married and be happy together.

I further suggest that you take your parents into your confidence and discuss this matter with them, and ask him to seek a little guidance from his parents also.

Pastor