This woman is eating away my money

Dear Pastor,

I am a 19-year-old man and my girlfriend is 22. I don't look my age; I look mature. She has a child for a man who is in his late 20s.

She said that the relationship with him was over. But the relationship is not over because she is always on the phone talking to him and the conversation that they are having doesn't have anything to do with the child they have together.

I grew up with my aunt and when my aunt met her, she told me that I should not continue with the relationship because that girl will only use me. I did not like what my aunt said and I told my girlfriend what she said and she cursed my aunt. My aunt complained to my mother. But now I can see that my girlfriend is not only having sex with her child's father, she is having relationships with other men. Every cent I make, she wants. The rent that we have to pay is $20,000 per month. I give her half the rent. Her child's father gives her $5,000 and she puts the other $5,000. She is always complaining that is not enough to carry a big woman.

When she was cursing my aunt, she said she didn't know why a big woman like her got mixed up with a little boy like me and I felt hurt. Because she doesn't have anywhere to live, she used to come to see me at my work place all the time and begged me for help. I used to save but now I can't. She is eating away all my money. When I told her that she should not say the things that she says, she told me I couldn't stop her and if she wants to take men with me, all I have to do is to leave because it is her body and she can do whatever she wants with her body.

I bought a stove for her on hire purchase and I am paying monthly for it. I am so fed up with her. I am waiting for the opportunity to take away the stove or call the store to take it back. I don't like when this woman calls me a boy, but whenever she wants anything from me, she says I am a perfect man. I am so confused.

S.A.

Dear S.A.,

You said that you grew up with your aunt and when your aunt met your so-called girlfriend, she told you not to go further with her because she is not a good girl. Your aunt saw that this woman was a user and you did not have the experience in dealing with this woman. This woman does not respect you. When she met you she was going through difficulties and she told you that she loved you. You took her on, paying half the rent, but she was always with her child's father. I can imagine how he laughs at you and what she has told him why both of you are together. Take the advice from your aunt and leave this woman.

You don't have to take the stove away from her. You can leave the stove and tell her to make the monthly payment. Go back to school and get some sort of training and don't be anxious to go and live with a woman. Please, accept my suggestion to you. This woman is making a fool out of you.

Pastor