My girlfriend is controlling - Every time I threaten to leave her, she says that she will destroy me

Dear Pastor,

I am going with a girl who is 27 years old. I am 30 and I love her. However, I am getting fed up because she is very controlling. She reminds me of the women I work with. They are always talking about how their men have to do what they say. They don't have respect for men.

My boss is a woman and sometimes the thing she says about her husband shows that she does not have any respect for him at all. She barks at him on the telephone and he is just like a little baby.

My girlfriend wants to tell me what to do. When I met her I told her that I have to support my mother because my father is disabled and cannot work. She wants to tell me how much I should give my mother. She is working and she has two children. I don't ask her how much money she gets from the father of these children. I don't have any privacy. She goes into my phone all the time. If I go to visit my parents and she believes that I am there too long, she calls and tells me to come home.

When I met her, she told me she had problem with being bossy, but she would change. She has not changed. I love her and she takes good care of me. She wants to push me around, and that is what I can't stand.

What can I do with this bossy woman? Every time I threaten to leave her, she says that she will destroy me. I am concerned about that. I am a troubled man. Please for your help.

Troubled

Dear Troubled,

May I suggest that you tell this woman that although you love her, you are not prepared to continue in the relationship. I also suggest that both of you go to see a family counsellor. When a woman comes between her man and his mother, she is going too far. She should be glad to know that you are doing your best to support your mother. You are not with a good woman and if she is not prepared to change, then you need to move on.

Pastor