My man can’t keep his weenie in his pants

Dear Pastor,

Peace be to you. I am writing to you for your advice. I have a man friend. We have been going on for nearly 10 years, but this man cannot keep his weenie in his pants.

I would say that he has three types of addictions. He drinks a lot, gambles a lot and he runs after women. To me, the drinking and the womanising are his worst addiction. When he doesn't have any money, his friends buy him liquor because he is always spending his money with them.

This man has nine children, three with me, and six with other women. When I was pregnant, two other women were pregnant by him. I don't know what they see in him because he doesn't have any money and he is short. When I first met him, I used to gamble with him, but I realized I was wasting my money so I quit.

Although we have these children together, I am planning to leave him because he is a womaniser. When he drinks, he would spend every cent he has in his pocket.

Imagine being with a man, and when you have to go into his pocket and take out everything he has in there!

There is this woman who is my age, and he has been with this woman without shame. I once asked her what she has that I don't have and she told me to have a good look at her. Pastor, all I see on her is a big backside, nothing more. That woman would call my man any time, and he would get up and go to her. One Christmas Eve I had to flatten all his car tyres so he couldn't leave to go to dance with this woman. But would you believe that his friends picked him up and took him away. That Christmas, we were very concerned because we didn't know where he was. He did not come back until Boxing Day. He got a girl pregnant because nine months later, he had another child.

When the young woman was two month's pregnant she came to the gate asking for him. He cursed the girl and told her to go and look for her baby father. I told the girl to stay and to explain to me what happened and she said she went out with him and they were drinking and they had sex. He did not tell her where he was living, but she found out where he was working and the people there told her his address. I cursed him and told him to go and accept his child. He eventually said he was the father.

What should I do about this man and his addictions? He likes porn and when he is looking at these films, he masturbates. He also likes to see girls having sex with girls. I asked him why he can't be like his brother, who is married and has a nice wife and children, and he told me everybody is different and everybody should live their own life.

He is always hoping to win big money in gambling. So, as far as I am concerned, he has lost everything. When this man is sober, he is the nicest man to have around. I don't know what to do with him. I am hoping that you can tell me.

J

Dear J,

I know for sure that you love this man. If you hadn't loved him, you would have moved on long ago. Because you love him, you have stayed with him. Generally speaking, men who go around and have so many children are men with money or men who give the women the impression that they earn a lot, and they can make them very happy.

Your man seems to be a poor man. He earns his little money and he has not been able to manage his money. He blows it on women. If he is always seeking women, he is definitely a sex addict.

I once asked a man how come he has so many children and he said that whenever he drinks in excess, he has sex and impregnate women. This man didn't have money either, but women just love him. Some men drink and when they feel high, they lay down and sleep, others go after women.

You asked a woman what she has that you don't have because looking at her, all she has is a big bottom. This woman wasn't sharp, she should have told you she sees in him, what you see. So what have you seen in this man why you have stayed with him? You did not say that this man and you are married, but evidently you want to remain with him and you want him to change. It is not going to be very easy for him to change. If he is willing to change then you should continue to try with him.

Make an appointment for him and go with him to see a psychologist. The change will not come overnight, but you have been living with him for 10 years, so I will say to you, don't give up on him now.

Pastor