I wasn’t blessed with a ‘big bamboo’

Dear Pastor,

I am 21 years old and I have had three girlfriends, who have all complained that my penis is too small. I have tried everything to get a bigger penis. I was told by my doctor that I should stop stretching my penis, because that will not help it to get larger.

I have a new girlfriend and I love her very much. I do not want to lose her, but I am afraid to ask her for sex, because I believe that she would tell me the same thing.

When I was growing up, I saw that my penis was smaller than my brothers' and they would make remarks like 'Boy, you don't have anything there.' We would laugh about it. The size of my penis didn't bother me so much, until I had my first girlfriend and had sex with her. My penis just went in and came out. She asked me how is it that it is so small. I replied that it was not small, but maybe she was too big for me. She said I was out of order to say that. Soon after, she told me that she had found another guy. She told me she still loved me and we could carry on a relationship on the side. She said the only reason she was leaving me was because of my penis size, so I should do something about that.

My second girlfriend was short and fat, so I thought the both of us would get along. She also said I was too short.

My third girlfriend had sex with me once, and the only thing she wanted from me was money. I was so upset when I found out that she was having a relationship with one of my cousins.

Pastor, I work very hard. I want to serve the Lord. I don't want to run around. I heard that I can increase the size of my penis by doing an operation, but I read in your column that you do not encourage men to do this type of operation. Is that true? I really want to serve the Lord and to get married when the time comes. So please give me your advice.

R.

Dear R.,

I am going to say something that I have never said before, but what I am about to say is true. I believe that women bring unnecessary pressure on men when they insist that size matters. Young men know that the first thing women do is to look at the front of their trousers. Some even tell by looking that they could see that they are gifted.

I have used this illustration on many occasions. I went into a business place and there was a man and a woman there. The woman was pretty loud. Evidently, the man asked her for sex and she grabbed him at his trousers front and said to him, 'You don't have anything there.' The man responded, 'Try me nuh, try me!'

Women describe men with small penises as 'toothpicks'. I was in a counselling session recently and the young woman told me that when she looked at the man's penis, it was so small it turned her off. So I know for sure that some women love a big penis. Some years ago, it was said that some women came to Jamaica to seek men because they heard that Jamaican men have what they describe as the 'big bamboo'.

A Canadian woman told me that she and her white girls had their boyfriends in Canada, but they decided to take a trip to Jamaica to seek a big bamboo, and that would be a secret between them. They made the trip to Jamaica and cheated on their boyfriends, and went back home to Canada as if they did nothing wrong.

I said these things to put your mind at ease. A 2020 review of research on penis size found that the average length of an erect penis is between 5.1 inches and 5.5 inches. I doubt very much that you have anything to worry about. I am sure your doctor has already assured you of that. I would also want you to know that the smallest penis is able to reach the most sensitive part of a woman's vagina. I will encourage you to do some research on the Internet and you will find that you are not in bad shape.

In another of my counselling sessions, a woman said her husband had a very small penis, but he is a great lover in bed.

When you think you have found a woman and you are ready to get married, make sure both of you go for a counselling session with an experienced family counsellor and discuss these things with him/her and you would be appropriately advised.

Pastor