He doesn’t want to meet my parents

Dear pastor,

I am 23 years old and I am still living at home. I have a sister who is also living at home, but she has a child.

My parents, who are Christians, were very upset when she became pregnant. When my sister found out that she was pregnant, she cried for days, and my father told her some very hot words. He said my sister disrespected him as a prominent man in society. I will not divulge my father's name, but he is well known.

I have graduated from university and I will be starting to work in January. I met a man who works in an insurance company. He says he loves me. I love him too, but I told him that I would love for him to meet my parents. He said that it is too soon for him to meet them, and that what I am telling him to do is an old-fashion way for a man to go about getting a girl and meeting her parents.

I am an old-fashion person. I have never had sex. Most of my girlfriends do not believe me, but that is the truth. No man has ever seen me naked. My sister and I had our own rooms. Sometimes we slept in the same room when we wanted to chat. But we had our own bedrooms and our own beds. We grew up as privileged young women. I told this man who likes me that he is turning me off by refusing to meet my parents. I cannot take him seriously. I am not looking for anything from him. I just need your guidance please.

A.R.

Dear A.R.,

Don't allow this guy to cause you to do anything that you do not want to do. He is showing an interest in you; he wants the both of you to have a relationship.

You are not against that, but you want him to meet your parents. Yes, you are an adult, and you can make your own decisions. You are not looking for your parents to tell you whether or not you should go into a relationship with him, but you would like to know how they feel about him. If this guy does not respect you enough to agree to meet with your parents, tell him to get lost. He is telling you that he is not the type of person for you to take seriously.

Pastor