Men need to pay attention to their health

You have one ol' time lyrics, I think is a Dinkie Minie or Brukins tune that says, "madda mac mi back, what a hellava shock." Well, is dah tune deh me a sing right now! And, ahm ... I have to finally admit as well that I don't really do my best work lying down. Fi real, peeps, I'm absolutely terrible in bed!

OK, now, you can take that to mean whatever you will, but guess what? I'm actually talking about the fact that I'm trying to write to you right now while stuck in bed and unable to sit up comfortably as I do battle with some sudden, severe and inexplicable back pain. Yes, people, mi nah lie, mi back feel like it just get fed up and collapse pon mi! Pain a screechy up and attack mi from back way till mi feel like likkle most mi almost nearly dead. So, I'm trying to do a thing, but my body and the laptop can't seem to arrive at mutually workable positions. We're just not in harmony. And the entire experience is on the edge of agony.

HUMAN FRAILTY

But look here nuh, friends and peoples, the play on sex is deliberate. Yes, because, as I deal with this quick, sharp note from my ageing body and the unexpected and unwelcome prompt about my own human frailty and mortality, I'm reminded again about some of the funny issues that make men's health such an interesting topic. And one of the first things that jook mi like the injection needles that I fear more than bullets, is the almost immediate connection to notions about sex that arises when we talk about men's health issues.

As a man, if you tell somebody you have backache, eight out of 10 people seem ready to make some corny quip about imagined causes or possible negative effects that invariably surround sex. No, I'm not quoting stats from any survey, I'm just talking from experience. People either start to laughingly suggest that the back problem is caused by some failed attempt at sexual acrobatics or they start cracking banal jokes about the great sex that will no longer be possible because of the back problems.

PREOCCUPIED WITH SEX

Yeah man, so when man busy fretting about whether him can manage to even stand up or walk without pain, people seem to feel that man should be more preoccupied with whether he can ever actually have sex again! And dem people deh is mainly other men! Can you tell me why?

The other matter that sat in front of my nose like an unchewable pill too large to swallow and beyond bitter to the taste is the idea that many men - myself included - relentlessly resist regular medical check-ups or routine visits, and obstinately ignore serious and recognisable warning signs from the body about possible ill health. And we do it to our own peril. We seem to stupidly insist on toughing it out as long as possible until pain stands up large and loud in front of us in the ring of life, and steps on our front foot before delivering two stunning uppercuts or, God forbids a massive knockdown.

Of course, as any veteran warrior in the battle of life knows, one is also more vulnerable in the latter rounds of the contest. In other words, the dangerous health punches are more likely as we get older. Yeah, men and brethren, a bigger opponent steps into the ring with us as we grow, whether gracefully or ungraciously. And he has some nasty knockdowns or TKOs in his awesome arsenal, some so severe they may render us unable to rise for the count. So, we need to listen to what our body says and heed the warning before di body get bex up and give up. A dat me a try do yah now, if I could just sit up! Still, is that last word deh inna di penultimate sentence me a deal wid - up! box-mi-back@gmail.com