In love with a jealous married man

Dear Pastor,

I am 22 years of age. I am stuck in a situation that I don't understand. I have been with my boyfriend for the past three years. He is 40 years old, and during that time we had some problem. He would go online, even with friends of ours, and flirt with them at times. He would try and get back with his child's mother. Then he would say it's because of his child.

It is not like he wants her back, but he keeps on flirting and I don't understand why. Even at one point, he would flirt with some girls, and then they would pass and throw word at me. When I asked him about it, he said nothing goes like that. When I looked through his phone, I saw something else.

Meeting place

But the real situation I am in now is that I have met a married man. We work at the same place. He had his own problem with his wife. When we started talking, it was weird because he was married. He and his wife had problems. He moved out on his wife, and we started to see each other even more, until we got sexually involved and the feelings developed for each other

Right now, even though no one knows we were together like that, he would get real jealous if any other guy talks to me for too long, or if they start to show interest in me, even though I am not interested. There is this other female who likes him, and even though I told him that it's nothing to me, they would play with each other in a certain way. Then there are rumours spreading that they are together. I saw him one day lifting her up in the air. I was so shocked. He then apologised for it. But if a guy talks to me, he would get upset. I am so confused about everything. Please, help me

K

Dear K.,

You have not said whether you are still with the man you consider to be your boyfriend. It seems to me that you have two men in your life. The 40-year-old man and the married man. The one who is single is not showing much respect for you, and he has lots of other women.

The married man has left his wife because of you and he is claiming you as his own. He is very jealous of you. You love him and the relationship is very serious, and he is a very jealous man. You are playing with fire and you know that very well.

May I suggest that you tell this married man to go back to his wife, and if he says he will have nothing to do with his wife anymore, tell him that you are not prepared to continue with him. Madam, this is a crazy world. This jealous man who works at the same place with you is not a good man to have in your life, and he will watch you like hawk. End the relationship with him, and do it early.

Pastor