What special projects could be keeping my boyfriend busy?

Dear Pastor,

I am a 21-year-old girl and I am having a problem with my boyfriend. I love him to my heart. We live about 10 miles apart, but he is always busy. However, whenever he wants something from me, he finds the time to see me. I always know when he wants sex. He would call me and tell me nice things, or just show up at my house with gifts. Sometimes I don't see him for days and weeks. He works with the government. His excuse is always that he is doing special projects, so I should try to understand. I have been faithful to him. He knows that I wouldn't do anything bad, and that I am not the run around type. I keep myself busy by studying online.

Whenever I complain to my grandma, she says I should remain true to him and don't let anything come between us. We have been friends for a long time. I want to know how to believe everything he says. My friends tell me that he has other women. I don't have any proof of that. If I follow what they say, I would have run him out of my life already. They say that a man can't stay so long without having a woman. Sometimes when they tell me these things and I go to my bed and cry myself to sleep.

If I find out that my boyfriend has another woman, as soon as I graduate, I would leave Jamaica and go and live in Canada. I wouldn't have anything to do with any man in the future. I would not want to leave grandma because I love her very much, but I have to think about myself, pastor.

So I am begging you for your best advice.

D.

Dear D.,

One thing I know for sure is that you should not listen to your girlfriends. They tell you that men cannot stay away from women for long period of time, only do so if they have other women in their lives. What do these girls consider to be long period? Two weeks, three weeks, a month, six months?

Don't listen to them. If you love your boyfriend and he loves you, both of you can work out your problems. You are a young girl, and you are smart. You know that at times he is talking nonsense by telling you that he is working on projects, and that these projects are taking up lots of his time.

I have said on numerous occasions that no man can be too busy to see his girlfriend. When a man has a woman he makes time to see her. That is the absolute truth. He can't be too busy to see her. However, even if he cannot see her in person, he should try to keep in touch with her. He can communicate by texting and calling and sending her flowers, etc.

You need to tell this guy that you are very unhappy with the way he is treating you and that he should stop taking you for granted. You are threatening to give up on this guy, but I say to you, do not do so. You have even said that if this man let you down, you would not want another man in your life. Don't talk that way, my dear. You are only 21 years old and you have a big future before you. If this man fails you, you will find another man and a better man.

Pastor