I have lost interest in sex

Dear Pastor,

I am the mother of a young child. My husband is fussing that since I had the baby, our sex life is not as good as it used to be. I do not have great desire for sex. My baby is five months old. My husband has begun to say that it seems as if I have lost interest in him. I have not lost interest in him. I have just lost interest in having sex.

A nurse told me that if I stop breastfeeding, my desire for sex will return. Sometimes when I don't respond to my husband's request, he slaps me, not to hurt me, but he is frustrated I know. Then he turns his back to the wall and masturbates to please himself and then he falls asleep.

N.P.

Dear N.P.,

I am not a medical doctor, so I am not qualified to give you medical advice. But I know that from my own reading and research that it is quite normal for some women who have given birth and who are breastfeeding to lose the desire for sexual intimacy for a while. Some men find it difficult to understand that. They think their women are ignoring them.

Try your best to cooperate with your husband and to assure him that you are not doing anything purposely to punish him. Whenever you are going back to see your doctor, such as your gynaecologist, ask your husband to accompany you and discuss the matter with the doctor. I am sure that the desire to have sex will return.

Pastor