Got pregnant the first time I had sex

Dear Pastor,

I always read your column. I am 25 years old. I never thought I would be writing to you, but I have reasons for doing so now. I grew up in a very strict family.

My parents have six of us, three boys and three girls. My father is a farmer and my mother assists him. He used to go to 'bush', while my mother stayed home and took care of the pigs. Each child had a pig or a goat, and we assisted our mother. All of us had to go to school and to church. The people in the district respected us.

I did not fool around boys until I got to the age of 21. A young man in the district told me that he loved me. I told him that I was not interested in him because my parents told us girls that we should not have anything to do with the guys from the area. But this guy was 25 and although he was born in the area, he did not live there and he was teaching a few miles away. I told my father what he said and he told me to invite him home. I was so shocked.

The young man was afraid to come because he knew my father to be a strict man. But he came, and I met him at the gate and I escorted him in. My father was impressed with him and told him he could come back at any time to see me. He did not come for about two weeks and my father asked me if he had got cold feet. When he came back, my parents excused themselves and left us alone to talk. At my age, I kissed a man for the first time and promised that I would visit him at his place. I went to his place about a month later and that is a visit I will never forget, because we had sex and we did not have any protection, so I got pregnant. It was my mother who told me that I was pregnant. I did not even know what was going on. I am happily married to this man and I am now pregnant with my second child.

E.R.

Dear E.R.,

I am glad that you met a man who loved you and one that your parents loved as their son-in-law. Everything is working well for you. I hope that you will take good care of your husband and that he will take good care of you, and that you all will have a lovely family. Your parents have set good examples for you and your siblings. Looking back, you may say they were tough, but they meant well. Time will prove that to be so.

Pastor