Boyfriend thinks I wear too much make-up

Dear Pastor,

I am 23 years old and I am in love with a man who is 31. He proposed to me and I told him that I would think about it, but I am having concerns. He is a very caring man.

I am employed and I work at the front desk. That is where I met him. He is a good businessman. He sends me flowers every week for no reason. My former boyfriend never sent me flowers. So when this man sent me roses for the first time, I was taken aback. I asked him why flowers and he said they speak for him because he is slow. But he is not slow, because he has an answer to everything I ask him.

ALREADY BEAUTIFUL

I have issues with him because I grew up in the church, and I continue to go to church, where I am active. He does not go to church as he is always very busy on a Sunday. But he gives me his offering. He has promised that whenever he starts to come to church, he will not stop. He doesn't want me to wear shorts whenever we are going out. He does not like me to wear heavy make-up. But I like to wear make-up. He said that I am already a beautiful girl and he likes to see me look natural. He has never asked me to help him out financially.

When we are together on dates, we turn off our phones. We have never searched each other's phones. I am originally from St James and he is from Clarendon. I plan to take him to meet with my folks during the Christmas holidays. He said that after he has met my parents, he will introduce me to his side of the family. We have only gone to bed a couple of times and I really love him. I wear make-up to work or to church. My church is not against a woman using make-up. How am I going to get along with this man if I can't wear make-up at all?

I used to do my hair often, now I don't even have to wear a wig. I have never asked this man for money, but he always wants to know what I need. I am living with my roommate and the rent is $60,000. I told my man that I want to move from where I am living and rent somewhere cheaper. But he likes the area I live in, so he has been encouraging me to stay where I am. I do not plan to live with him unless we are married.

R.L.

Dear R.L.,

This man met you at the office where you work and I am sure that you were wearing make-up, and it didn't get in the way of his love for you.

He doesn't want you to use it when both of you are going out. So it is up to you to decide what you are going to do. Some men go too far with this matter of make-up. Some women put on too much make-up and are not even aware that too much of it makes a woman look ugly.

I want to make this suggestion. If you love this man and he loves you, and both of you believe that you have a future together, make an appointment with a family counsellor and both of you go together and discuss your problems. I wish both of you well.

Pastor