Friend’s babyfather is trying to sleep with me

Dear Pastor,

I am 24 years old and I have a friend. She has a child with a man. She is 23 years old. She asked me to babysit for her, so I went. She is living with her babyfather.

I always thought that he was a decent man, but when I went there to babysit, her boyfriend came home and he asked me if I could keep a secret and I told him yes. He said he had always admired me and he would love to go to bed with me. I told him there was no way I would do that. He said that it could be between the both of us.

This man told me that he knew that I would not tell his babymother and I told him I would. He said that he would deny it and his girlfriend would believe him. I tried to reach his babymother on the phone, but I couldn't. She got home soon after. I told her that I had something to say to her, but she should promise me that she would not tell her babyfather. She told me that she suspected what it was about, but I didn't tell her. She asked him to carry me home and while we were in the car, he said that he had not given up on having sex with me. I repeated that I would tell his babymother. I will never go back to his house.

I told one of my friends that this guy approached me for sex and she said that he approached her as well. Both of us decided that we would tell our friend that he asked us for sex and we were not coming back to her house unless she was there. But we didn't want them to break up because she is out of a job and she is depending on him for support. We don't know what to do. She is a lovely friend.

This guy believes that because he is working lots of money that we will go to bed with him. I have my boyfriend and my girlfriend has hers. I am not living with my boyfriend but I can go there at any time. This guy did not offer me money, but he offered my girlfriend money. Should I just tell her that she should not trust him and give her the reasons why we will not come back to her house? I am hoping to hear from you very soon.

C.B.

Dear C.B.,

You told your girlfriend that you have something to say to her but you have not done so. When you spoke to your other friend, she told you that this man had also approached her for sex and he also offered her money, but he did not offer you any.

I suggest that you do not say anything to her. But if she asks you in the future to babysit for her, you should say no and then you should tell her why. It is likely that he will deny that he approached any of you to go to bed with him. But you should also tell her that your friend also confided in you and told you that he approached her for sex and offered her money.

I am glad you did what is right. Take good care of yourself.

Pastor