Mom thinks my boyfriend is too dark

Dear Pastor,

I have a boyfriend who is in love with me. I love him too, but his love for me is crazy. We went to school together. He was the first guy who blew in my face. I come from a privileged family, but my boyfriend didn't. I am of light complexion and he is dark.

I love him because he is very bright. I cannot manage mathematics, but he is strong in that area, so he helps me. We used to meet at a certain place and he would help me to understand mathematics. However, it is no longer convenient to meet at that place.

I have talked so much about him that my mother asked me if I am in love with this man and I told her no, and the conversation ended there. Another time I said something about him and she made a crude remark. I showed her his picture in my cell phone and she commented on his blackness.

My mother is of light complexion, but my father is dark. The only thing my mother has going for her is her complexion. She is not educated, but my father is. I want to tell my father about my boyfriend. I would like to invite him to meet my parents but I do not want them to insult him. I know my father will not do that, but my mother is crazy enough to make rude remarks about him. I know that my boyfriend will not accept any disrespect from her.

I kindly ask you for your opinion on this problem I am face with.

B.L

Dear B.L.,

You can get around this problem with your mother easily by telling her that you have fallen in love with this guy. You will not be lying because you are in love with him. She has already made a comment about his complexion and if she raises the matter again you can simply say that love is colour blind.

Your father seems to be a wise man. You can prepare your boyfriend to meet with them by telling him that your mother would be surprised to know that you are in love with a man who is of dark complexion, and so he should not overreact if she says anything that he may consider not becoming.

Tell your father that your mother has already said that she is surprised that you are in love with a man of dark complexion, but you hope that he would accept your boyfriend. I trust that your boyfriend would continue to assist you in mathematics and in whatever way you need his help. However, be very careful how you operate with him. Let the love that you have for him remain in your heart and not go to your head.

Pastor