Fiancé wants only Bob Marley music at our wedding

Dear Pastor,

My boyfriend and I are hoping to get married. We are looking forward to that special day, but my boyfriend does not want us to get married in a church.

He does not believe in traditional weddings, but I love them. I love to have bridesmaids, a maid of honour and groomsmen. He is a Rastafarian. He does not even believe that he should get married in a church. He also thinks that we can play Bob Marley songs and pure reggae music at the reception. He said that the minister should be a Rastaman, and the dinner should be fish and vegetables.

When I told some of my friends the type of wedding I am planning to have, some of them said perhaps I really want to get married, given the type of wedding. My mother said that she will not attend. My father said he will attend because that type of wedding will not cost him much. We don't know any Rastaman who has a licence to marry people, so we decided to write to you to ask for your advice. So, please give us some guidance here, Pastor.

Rasta

Dear Rasta

In Jamaica, the person who is authorised to officiate at weddings has to be appointed by the government as a marriage officer.

His appointment would be gazetted and he would be called to the Registrar General's Department and receive his appointment. So whether he is a Rastafarian or not, he has to go through the same process like anybody else. If your fiance does not want any minister of religion to handle his wedding, he need not worry. What is important is that the minister should be appointed by the government as a marriage officer.

Your mother shouldn't be worried about the type of wedding that you want. It is solely up to you. You wouldn't have to be buying a very expensive wedding gown, and your man wouldn't have to worry himself about buying a very expensive ring. In fact, he doesn't have to have a ring at all. He could make his own ring out of grass or use whatever he feels like using. I have officiated in many weddings where no rings were used. I have even done some weddings for free. I enjoyed a wedding of a couple who asked me to stay and have breakfast with them. And what a good breakfast it was! They served ackee and salt fish and Johnny cakes. At another wedding that I enjoyed, a number of guests were there, but apart from the bride, all the guests wore jeans, and the wedding was very much middle-class.

Do what you want to do - but remember, everything has to be done according to the law.

Pastor