Caught a man wearing my underwear

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem that I consider to be serious. I am living with my girlfriend in Kingston but I have a brother who lives in St James.

His house was damaged, so every week I am down there assisting him to rebuild it. He has two children and he lost his roof. He is on his face, so to speak. His friends and neighbours have been very good to him, so I go there to assist him and other relatives have sent money to me to give to him.

My girlfriend and I don't have children together and she is working. But I am so disappointed in her. I try to come home and be with her every Sunday. But a couple of Sundays ago, I came home, but it was not at my usual time. I got a ride from friends who were coming into Kingston. It was late Saturday night. When I got to the house, the gate was unlocked, which was unusual, because the landlord always told us to lock it.

I came in and I heard people talking in my apartment. I turned the house door key and when I went in, I saw a man and a woman in the house. Everybody was shocked to see me. The man was in my shorts and the girl was in her underwear and my girlfriend was also in her underwear. It seems like they were planning to do a threesome, or they had done it and were just relaxing. I asked my girlfriend what was going on and she told me that this man and his girlfriend were passing through and they called her and she told them that she was alone and they asked if they could spend the night. She said she told them yes. I asked the gentleman why he was in my clothes and he said he didn't have anything to wear and so my girlfriend gave him my boxers.

I was so surprised to see my girlfriend only in her underwear in front of a stranger. That is what we wear when we are at home together alone. So I grabbed her and gave her two slaps and told her to go put on some clothes. She started to cry and said that I should know that she would never cheat on me. I asked her if she is not cheating on me, how could she only be wearing a panty in front of a stranger and his girlfriend? I always trusted her and I was hoping that I would marry her. Now I am so puzzled. I don't know what to do. I don't know if you understand how shocked I was.

My girlfriend got down on her knees and begged me not to beat her. The man said it is not how it looks. He insisted that they didn't do anything and they didn't intend to do anything. My mind is already made up, but I want to hear what you say, so please give me your advice.

P.L.

Dear P.L.,

Your girlfriend is crazy. She is a foolish liar and you shouldn't have to write to me for my opinion.

You can handle this situation peacefully. What I am trying to say is that if you have not asked this lady to leave, then you are playing with fire. You shouldn't believe a word she told you. That is rather unusual for a woman to give another man her boyfriend's underpants, for her to be dressed only in underwear, and for the man's girlfriend to be dressed in the same way. Perhaps they look at you as a fool, but you know you are not a fool. Perhaps you are quite right in believing that all three of them were planning something. Or perhaps they had already engaged in it. As I said before, she is crazy.

If you really intended to marry her, you shouldn't go through with it.

Pastor