Boyfriend’s mom is too nosy

Dear Pastor,

How are you dealing with the weather? It has been very cold, but this is my type of weather.

I don't like when it is hot. I am in my late teens, 18 1/2 to be exact, and I am going through some problems. I am living at the home of my boyfriend and his mother. My parents are living abroad. My boyfriend's mother is always watching me. She takes news to him. I have people calling me on my phone. They are my friends. As soon as my boyfriend comes home, she tells him that I am on the phone all day, which is not true. I do what I am supposed to do, such as wash and iron my boyfriend's clothes. I don't wash for her.

When I first came here to live six months ago, my boyfriend told me not to touch anything for her, so I don't. I do not cook for her either. My boyfriend takes me to the supermarket to shop for ourselves. He gives his mother money for our room because when he was bringing me here to live, she told him he would have to pay for the room because she can get it rented. It is a very convenient room because it has its own bathroom. I make sure that our room and bathroom are kept clean. She claims to be a Christian, so I do not play loud music. When her head 'takes' her, she plays gospel music from morning until night. She does not like to see me in pants, but my boyfriend told me to ignore her. So I wear my pants, but I do not wear very short shorts.

My boyfriend and I are planning to get married soon. She told him that he is in too much of a hurry to get married because he has not yet got me pregnant. She said he should wait for another year or two. This lady goes to bed very early. After she does, you can hear a pin if it drops in her room. I swear that when my boyfriend and I are having our time, she can hear us. So that is the time we turn up our television.

Other than taking news to him about me, I can't give her any bad name. She has a lovely home and she loves her son. I love him too. But I would like her to mind her own business. She is 71 years old.

My boyfriend says that she had a man who used to always visit her, but he died suddenly. He thinks that she is still fretting over him. She is always telling him that she dreamt about him.

E.M.

Dear E.M.,

Continue to show respect to your mother-in-law. She knows that her son will eventually marry you.

He has told you to ignore her. It is not going to be easy to do so, but if that is the only thing she is doing, she is not doing much, so you should be able to deal with her. She loves her son and she would love to have a perfect woman for him, which is not possible. She wants him to impregnate you before he marries you. So many mothers give their son that advice. Don't take her on at all. I doubt very much that he would listen to that advice from her. Be a good tenant and pay your rent on time

This lady has lost her good friend, and so, according to your boyfriend, she might be fretting over him. You can't do anything about that. All the best; take it easy now.

Pastor