‘Stop using mother’s fat to fry children’ - Single dad tells fathers to step up

Waldermar Donaldson had single fatherhood thrust upon him, but he lovingly embraced the challenge.

Donaldson said that he received a phone call from the mother of his then six-year-old daughter Odanya, who he calls 'Chrissy', to pick her up from school.

"When I finally got Chrissy's mother, she told me she was in Antigua and I was like, 'What!'" he told the CENTRAL STAR.

According to him, the child's mother had simply run off.

Donaldson said he didn't quarrel, but just started thinking on what his next move would be.

Donaldson, who is the father of six children - three girls and three boys - said five are all grown now, leaving him with Odanya.

Although he had a hand in raising his other children, he said Odanya was the most challenging.

"I had to be trying to find a way to cope and make her comfortable. She is the youngest, and I had to raise her and ensure I raised her (properly)," he said.

He said that with the responsibility of ensuring she stayed in the right environment, he ended up taking her to three different places before he got her settled in a good environment where she could focus, be taken care of, and attend school.

Donaldson, who admitted to being a total novice when it came to combing hair, is thankful for the many 'community mothers' who have assisted him in various ways.

He said the early days were rough, so he had to spend much time with Odanya, as the situation with her mother affected her; the hardest thing for him was telling her the truth on why her mother wasn't around.

"So from a small child she goes everywhere with me," he said. He also gives credit to the teachers and guidance counsellors who were supportive.

Donaldson, who is an ardent Christian and worships at the Voice of Victory Ministries in May Pen, said fathers should realise the awesome responsibility they have and "stop using the mother's fat and fry the children".

"It's wrong! Be a man and ensure your children are well taken care of, regardless of what the situation is between you and the child's mother; don't neglect the child," he said.

There are days when he doesn't have all that his children need, but he said he teaches them the principle of patience.

"In teaching these principles, the child will not be rebellious. As a father, I had to teach my daughter this principle until it grew into her," he said.

Donaldson is now breathing a bit easier as Odanya is now 17 and "self-sufficient". He says he still attends all her Parent Teacher Association meetings and remains very involved in her school life.

Odanya, who attends Vere Technical High School, will be graduating in a few weeks.