Found condoms in my husband’s car

Dear Pastor,

This is the second time I am writing to you. You helped me in my relationship the first time I wrote to you about my husband, and things improved.

My husband doesn't talk a lot. He is a handsome guy. He has a good job. But I found out that he is seeing another woman. He swore on the Bible that it is not true. I know that he is lying because when he is, he cannot look me in the face. I borrowed his car because mine was in the garage, and just when I was about to put my bag on the back seat, I saw something that aroused my curiosity. Believe me, it was a pack of condoms. I could not move, so I called him out of the house and asked him what were condoms doing in his car. He said his brother had used the car the day before, so it must be his. He took them up and said if I did not believe him, he could call his brother. I didn't bother to call his brother, because he would never let him down. I tried to get him to admit that the condoms belonged to him and when he wouldn't look at me, I slapped him and he walked away.

I did not bother to go to the function. I decided to have it out with my husband. He said, "You see how you are provoking me? Why would I leave you here and go and sleep with another girl?" We argued until late. I asked his brother to come by, but he didn't. Do you think this man is speaking the truth? He and I don't use condoms. What do you think is going on?

Anonymous

Dear Writer,

Some years ago, a woman told me that she had a good relationship with her husband, but one Saturday, she spotted something in her husband's car from her bedroom window.

So she investigated and realised that it was a pack of condoms. Out of the pack, one had been used. Her husband said he didn't know how it got there. From that incident the relationship started to deteriorate, and I am sad to tell you that that couple is now divorced.

Would it not have been better if you simply said to your husband, "I don't believe you; you are a liar"? Why did you have to slap him? If he had slapped you back, it would have turned into a big fight. One of you could have ended up at the hospital. Very few men would tell a woman the absolute truth, especially when he knows that he is guilty of infidelity.

I know that some people will say that 'Pastor is encouraging slackness.' I am not. I am just telling you the absolute truth. You should have found a way to control your anger. If the man is guilty and was going to have sex with another woman, and the woman had a disease, using the condom would have been protection for your sex life.

So next time when you believe your husband is guilty of doing something wrong, think of your health also.

Pastor