My husband is too miserable!

Dear Pastor,

I am 32 and my husband is 39. We have been together from I was a teenager but got married in 2012. We have three beautiful children.

We are coming from humble beginnings where I can remember being hungry while with him. However, we both worked hard and he now has his own business with aid from me. I do my own little business in the community. Pastor, my husband is so angry som I suggested to him that we go see a family counsellor but he refused to saying that he is going to change but the cycle goes on and on. I am considering leaving him and going abroad for a while. He doesn?t know but I can?t deal with it anymore. He has made tremendous sacrifices for me so it?s hard to leave but I think my happiness and sanity should take first place. What says you on this matter, pastor?

P.J

Dear P.J.

Evidently your husband is working under great stress and he is not even aware that his behaviour is affecting you. You have pointed out a number of things to him but it is not all men who listen to their women. Here is what I like about your letter. You say that you love him and you are convinced that he loves you too.

I have a suggestion to make. Tell your husband that both of you should employ a day?s worker. This person would come in to wash, clean and iron for two days or so and you would not be too tired for your husband. And when he comes home he will sense the difference. So, make the suggestion to him but please, stay with your man. And you may even suggest to him that both of you should go on a vacation. Perish the thought of leaving your husband permanently.

Pastor