I'm dating my boyfriend's ex-girl man

Dear Pastor,

I am 23 and in a relationship for almost a year now. It has been good, although we have our ups and downs. After I left school in June, I went to live with him and I started working. I met this other guy, and I started dating him. Then I realised that he was my boyfriend's ex-girlfriend's man. We started hanging out. I really like him, and as far as I know and see, the feeling is mutual. We had sex a couple of times, and it was great. I don't even want to have sex with my boyfriend anymore. This guy feels the same about me and I know he won't disrespect me.

My boyfriend and the girlfriend of the guy I'm cheating with found out about our relationship, so I had to tell my boyfriend that he was my best friend's man, and he told his girlfriend that I was his best friend's woman. He doesn't show his girlfriend much attention again, and I know this because I am around him most of the time. Sometimes he would give me his phone, and when she calls or texts, he ignores her, and they always argue. I asked him if it was because of me, and he said no and that they always argued and he wanted to get rid of her because she was bad.

He introduced me to his parents and most of his siblings. He is not afraid to hang out with me.

Pastor, I know how men are, but I wonder if this is going to last. Both of us have birthdays in the same month and so does my boyfriend. He never shows me any bad face. He treats me well, and so does my boyfriend. I don't want to leave him and I don't want to break my boyfriend's heart. They both have no kids and they want to have their children with me, but I am not ready. I know my child would get good support both ways, but I am just not ready. As a young lady, I have to set my goals straight first. I know it can happen in the process, though.

Pastor, I need your advice. Please tell me what to do.

P.B.

Dear P.B.,

It seems to me that you are bad, and the other girl is bad, according to her boyfriend. It's pure "bun" on both sides. From high school you moved in with this man and things were going well, according to you, and yet you felt compelled to establish another relationship and have been having sex with this new man. If things were going so well, why did you have to cheat on your man and you both are in a committed relationship?

You are not a good girl. You can jump high or low, you could not convince me that you are a good girl. You shouldn't say a word about the character of another woman. You described yourself as a lady, but you are not. A lady has to keep her legs closed for other men, and you are not doing that, so don't call yourself a lady.

You have to drop the "bunna" man right now and consider what you have done a big mistake. You are playing a dangerous game, and if you don't stop, you are going to get yourself into trouble.

Pastor