I believe she has tied me!

Dear Pastor,

I have been involved with a woman for almost 10 years. I went to do some work for a man and I met her. She was his helper. His wife was living in America. I was employed to do some roofing work and to paint the house. She and I became friends, and in less than a week, we were lovers. I did not know that she was married. She told me that she didn't have children or a man. She offered to give me lunch if I would provide her with the groceries. She said that the owner of the house had a woman who went there and checked on her, and that the woman was very nosy. She asked a lot of questions.

She accused the woman of having an affair with the man, but it was not true. She did not know that the woman was the man's sister-in-law. He never told her.

She told me everything about the man. She said that he was a lodge man and that he liked to dress in black.

This man was always very busy and he was not watching her. She liked him, but he did not have a relationship with her.

She was very jealous. After hearing her say bad things about the man, I stopped eating from her for a time.

I found out that she had a husband and two children in the country. I heard the woman telling her that she could go down at such and such a time to see her husband and her children because Mr so and so would be leaving for a week to be with his wife. I was shocked! I asked her why she had lied to me.

She made me have sex with her, and I had never had sex with a married woman. She told me that she didn't consider the man her husband because they were not living together.

Do you think this is a good woman? I have tried to leave this woman, but I don't know what to do. I believe she has 'tied' me. When she should have gone home, she did not go. I spent the whole week with her.

I finished the work I was doing at the house, but I got other jobs from the owner of the house. Then we started to live together.

It is like I can't help myself. She is still married but is looking after her divorce. She is hoping we can get married. She is not good marriage material. I can't save any money. If I talk to her about my money, she curses.

J.B.

Dear J.B.,

I consider you a joker. How could you allow yourself to be fooled by this woman you had not known at all? You met her at the house where you went to work. You just drank in her story without asking any questions. An intelligent man wouldn't do that. An intelligent man would ask the owner of the house about her to verify her story. You were too eager to get under her skirt, so you made yourself into a fool and she had you covered before you were able to count 1,2,3.

She was glad to have you. She wanted to leave her husband, and you were a good catch. I don't know about her 'tying' you. You love your stomach, so you gave her your money and she cooked and fed you. You are not a wise man. You have her now as your common-law wife. This woman probably has been saving her money from you to get her divorce. She is 'eating you out', so to speak. It has taken you 10 years and you haven't learnt that this lady is a pathological liar.

I would suggest that you end the relationship with her and hide yourself somewhere so that she can't find you. Where would that be? I don't know. Figure it out.

Pastor