My niece is bringing men to our house

July 09, 2024

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you from America. I always read your column. It helps me to know what is going on in my beautiful island, Jamaica.

I am in my 60s but I long to return to Jamaica. My husband is older than me. He is Jamaican by birth, but he has no intention of returning. I do not want to leave him because I know he will go astray, and I don't intend to have another man in my life. We have five children together; they visit Jamaica, but America is their home. They were all born here. We have 10 grandchildren and they are all Americans. We have a property in Jamaica. We have relatives living in the house and whenever anything goes wrong, we send the money for them to repair it. The last major thing we did was refurbish the bathroom. We told them that the bathroom should not be used at all; it should be kept so that when my husband and I are visiting, we can be comfortable.

I have a niece living at the house, but we asked her to leave because the neighbour told us that she was using our house as a motel; she had one man after the other at the house at nights. Our nearest neighbour is a Christian man who lives with his family and they would not lie on her. The niece said that whosoever told us that she is using our house as a motel, is lying. We did not call anybody's name, but we believe what we were told. There were two other people in the house; they are very nice nephews. When we asked them about what she was doing, they said it is true that she has many male visitors.

My husband said that women might be visiting our nephews there, but I believe that my niece is loose. Why is it that she would not go and seek a job? It is easier for her to entertain men at our house. Now we want her out, so we gave her until the end of September to find somewhere else to live.

Our children don't want us to return to Jamaica to live; they said it is too dangerous and we would be far away from them. But whenever I am in Jamaica, I feel safe. America is just as violent. If the Government can keep crime down, Jamaica would be a paradise. I told my niece that if she had only kept one boyfriend, we would not ask her to leave, but she has a trailer load of men coming to the house, and I know the neighbour is not lying.

H.G.

Dear H.G.,

I hope the neighbour is not lying on your niece. Are you paying him to watch your house?

There are two men living in the house; they are not married, and their girlfriends perhaps visit them too. How come this man is not talking about that? How do you know that this man is not obsessed with your niece for personal reasons? Perhaps he has tried to get her or he has tried to be intimate with her, but she has refused him. I am sorry that you have asked her to leave your house. You are not renting the place, therefore you should have a female staying there with your nephews. I am suspicious about your neighbour. Doesn't he have anything to do with his time? During your visits to Jamaica, did you observe men going and coming to the house? Perhaps you and your husband should take a trip to Jamaica unannounced; that would help you to assess the situation at your house.

Your husband is not interested in returning to Jamaica to live, but you would like to return. If he is not coming back, please stay where he is, otherwise you will probably destroy your relationship of many years. From the tone of your letter, I can see that you are afraid of losing him if both of you are not together for any long period. Be wise and stay with your man wherever he is.

Pastor

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