Still caan get di green card

Yoggo Yoggo Yow!! Waa gwaan TamFam?? Unu good? Waan say bless up all Ragashanti Live listeners pon Tambourine Radio. Straight blessings.

Peeps, mi say we unda it up ya a Obama lan' wid dem crazy election. A bare sitten. Madniss deh pon ovadrive. Di United States of America will not be the same after this election, craases to di max. Anyways, pree da mixup ya.

A bredda up ya neva have him papers an mek a link wid a woman fi buss a marriage an fi apply fi di ting.

Afta di marriage dem deal wid di application fi di green card an sen it een. But den di bredda goh get inna some fight drama wid some hustla yute an end up inna jail. Because him inna jail it led to some complications weh prevented him fram getting di green card. Wen him lef jail him hit di road again wid him undocumented status and end up a divorce di woman.

Years later, Missa Man link up wid a nex woman and reach a point weh him an har married an him apply fi him green card again. Yeah application sen een propa. People unuh nuh know say afta dat di man madda goh dead a Jamaica! Him tek it to heart an say him haffi goh back a Jamaica fi him madda funeral. Him goh di funeral and of course, crazy problems reach him fi goh back eena di US. Dem neva let him back een. Him an him wife bruk up an she bax him inna him nastiniss wid a divorce.

Still years lata, di dawg manij fi again drap back inna di US. Deh ya fi a while an link up wid a anedda woman. Years afta di link, him an har married and, of course, him sen een anedda application. People, afta application gaan een unu nuh know say di man healthy-healthy wife jus suddenly drap dead!! A wicked heart attack jus claat har dung. Of course dat kill di application. Him did try fi fight it but dem gi him some argument say him 'sponsor' dead soh di application cyaan goh tru. Yeeeeeeeoooooowww!!!!

Anyways, wah day ya now, di dawg did done lock di ting wid yet anedda woman. Tings seal up wid dem propa! And yups, application fi green card rinse again. Den unuh nuh know say right afta him drap off di application inna di mail him mek di following comment: "A hope di fourth time a mi lucky time." Same time him wife ask him wah him a talk bout? Him den explain di whole drama dem bout di three oda time him did apply fi green card. Him wife listen carefully.

HIM SALT BAD

Layta di wife goh home an tell har relative dem weh har husband say. Di relative dem get bringle an tell har say she fi leggo di man caa him salt bad! Dem presha har wicked fi she fling him a bush. Dem talk up a bag a tings bout how him saltniss a goh kill har. Dwl

She den goh tell him weh har relative dem say. Him get bex bout it an start gwaan bad. Him an har end up a argue, argue nuff, to di point weh di ting get worse an worse between dem until big fight bruk between dem!! Inna di fight di two a dem wap up one anedda. Wen har relative dem hear, dem say di fight a confirmation bout him saltniss. Before yuh know it di woman sen on a divorce pon di dawg an mek him know she nuh bada waan file fi him. An jus like dat di boss fourth application fi him green card get flap. Now him a wonda if him fi even try again? Him a wonda if him jus 'salt' an will neva get a green card. Dawg all a wonda if dem obeah him.

Weh unu tink? A string of coincidences or him jus 'salt'?

Anyways, a leggomentz. Sen on unu mixup dem to mi at ragashanti@ragashanti.com. See unu nex Thursday same place ya soh inna di STAR. Tek care.

Road!!