Taking a life is never the solution

April 27, 2018
mourners

Today I want to send a message to my fellow Jamaican men.

It is a message someone needs to send, because, for too many years, we men have been told not to feel when we do feel.

We have been told to be strong, when sometimes we need someone to be strong for us.

We are told not to cry because it is a sign of weakness. In short, we are told not to be human. We are taught to be machines.

The only thing wrong with that is that we are not machines. We feel but we hide it, we cry but we hide it. All of that build pressure and as the saying goes, 'pressure bus' pipe'.

We have been seeing a lot of 'bus' pipes lately, the most recent being the incident in Hanover, where a man apparently killed his two children, who are both under 10 years old, as well as their mother.

We have no official word yet as to why this happened. There have been rumours, but nothing to say what could have forced a man to do this to a woman and children who he was to be protecting.

A couple years ago, I was unfortunate enough to see a video of a woman being viciously chopped to death over infidelity.

Now, I know pride is a hell of a thing and if you feel that your woman is being unfaithful, it hurts. You feel like a fool.

You feel like your friends and the wider society will laugh at you. "Gwey bwoy, u ooman a gi u bun!" It is hard to take. I get that. So here is my message to you.

If you feel like this is happening to you, accept it. Find someone responsible to talk to. Note I said 'responsible', because each of us has a friend, or friends, who will fuel us with rage and insecurities that will drive us to do foolish things.

After that, find a place to collect your thoughts, shed a tear or two for a month or two, or three, or five or six. Hey, take as long as you want.

If it works for you, get a bottle of something strong and get a drink or two, but not too many so as to let your guard down and then feel empowered to do stupid things.

Before you know it, you will be fine. You can then get on with your life.

Taking a life is never the solution. Take it from me. I have been there.

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