The small plane experience!

This is one of the sure time when you look up in the sky and really wondering, "A wah dat?!" because the only reason why you won't mistake what you see for a big bird is jus becaz bird nuh mek so much nize!!

Howdie my peeps! Is how unuh do tiddeh? Bwoy I nah complain. That shower a rain and breeze we get over the weekend doh; man it sweet mi! Now them cya tap lock off the pipe dem a night time bout drought cause mi know likkle water must ketch. Lol! Den a noh lie. Even for a week lol!

Anyway, you know in life how they always telling us how size shouldn't matter? (Well actually they quite contradicting with that but nonetheless ...) Mi change my mind; going forward mi only want big tings. Yes mi very certain because the edda day I take one of them small planes and saying small is decent it actually likkle. #VERYLIKKLE!

The plane is so small you are only allowed a 10lb bag as a carry-on! Like what is ten pounds? Two or three small chickens?! Seriously. It was an upsetting experience for me and this has nothing to do with me being spoilt. Worse of all the plane fare is the same like regular. Evil!

The overhead bins are so small they can't hold a good size handbag. Lawd gosh fi all the people dem weh love carry them 'house and land handbag' mi sorry fi unuh. It couldn't hold! Under the seat isn't any bigger either! Lmao! The leg room is so close; especially the front row seats should seat really skinny fidlo didlo-type people without the tall legs or kids. It's that close. Kmt I'm not exaggerating. Unuh know mi talk it like it is all the time. Apparently I wasn't the only one who had an issue with the size as one lady argued, "Dis yah plane likkle man. Afta nutten cya hold in di overhead bin man kmt!"

Another was upset that the plane ticket was so 'dear' (expensive)! I was just upset at the size overall but relieved no fluffy people were on board LMAO!!

FLUFFY PEOPLE

Listen don't get mad at me. I have nothing against fluffy people but is the truth "no fat sumady have no business on a plane like dat!" You would be trying to commit suicide by squeezing yourself to death. If little me can barely hold and I' m only 5'5" tall and weigh 140 lbs den is weh yuh wudda hol'?! DWL! Wooooie that would be an interesting sight though. Funny! But seriously they have a size restriction. #deadass

A girlfriend was traveling with me, I promised her I wouldn't tell anybody but I lied! Lol! It was her first time traveling so I offered her my window seat. What was funny was di girl siddung and a she a fasten my seat belt over her lmao! Im sorry I couldn't hold it. People were looking at us wondering what was so funny but it's OK I didn't loud her up. I was kind enough to show her how to release the seat belt realizing they were drawn short. Hear her now, "Girl I'm not that big!" In my head I was like yeah ... OK ... Shut up you just fastened my seatbelt over you. SMH. Miss know it all knoweth nothing, newbie. After making an attempt and failed she say, "Oh broad I mean!"

When the plane engine started up she exclaimed, "This is that sh*t!" We shared a laugh. I started explaining to her that she might feel a little funny in her stomach when they take off because after all my years of travelling I still feel that way. She said she was OK.

The flight attendant asked an elderly couple sitting at the exit if they could manage in case of an emergency if they could manage to help. Of course not! They were switched to a different seat but the thing was no one wanted to sit in that seat. I thought that was funny too. Might as well had leave them old people; slow help better than none Dwl! I wonder though why we always preparing for a crash..... Does that ever cross your mind or is it just me? Oh well! I think they need to upgrade these planes with parachute instead of just life vest cause they act like all the time you gonna fall in water should the plane go down. Finally a young woman volunteered so we were ready to go and I was not anticipating the ride in this little plane. I was praying hard in my head .... "Lord please keep this bird, I mean plane, in the air. Please let us reach safe. Keep us from turbulence cause I don't think we could survive that storm. I want to come back home to my child Lord. Carry us safely.....

"Ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking. Thank you for flying Inter-Caribbean Airways blah blah blah...... " this man no see me a pray. Cho. Kmt.

Weh mi did reach.... Yeah, "Lord please keep this bird alive. Amen!" As soon as I'm done I looked out and realize we were taking off next thing I heard.... This b*tch beside me... Fimmi fren she deh pon singing, "I'm going down I'm telling timber..... !!!"

FIRST TIME

"OMG!!! Seriously girl. This is your first time flying we are taking off and that's the only song that can pop in your head are you crazy?" I was disturbed. Honestly, after mi just pray fi God keep us afloat. SMH.

She was laughing. I had to laugh too, "Is the only song mi cudda think of."

Shame. Shame. Shame. God bless us all.

Everything was going OK until they started giving out some small swizzle look-alike box juice. I wish they had just given us some water. The juice taste like bare corn syrup. I tasted it and put it down. Mi a young pickney gal them already send up part a mi pressure to how the plane small dem nah go send up my sugar level. Is alright. Yuck. As usual there is someone to back my thoughts up, "A wa kinda sweet sinting dis yah dem a gi people fi drink kmt!" Lol! My sentient exactly sir. Thank you!

People unuh walk good yah. Don't ever make the small plane a part of your flying experience it nuh nice. Be warned. If you did it already. Kudos to you! We have been there done that and probably not doing it again. For me.....definitely #NOT. I love my life. Big up unuh self. Bless. Gossipchica out!!