Cop boyfriend tells too many lies

Dear Pastor,

I have been reading your column from I was in high school. I am now 19 years old and attending university.

I am the only child for my parents. I grew up in a Christian home. I attended Sunday school and church every Sunday. I have always been my father's pet. My mother is a school teacher and my father is a policeman. Whenever my mother and father are not pleased with each other, my mother tells me that I should not marry a policeman because policemen always have their wives under arrest. I love my father and I know my mother loves him too. But what my mother told me not to do is what I am doing now.

I have a boyfriend and he is a police officer. He is a nice guy, but he lies a lot. He looks me straight in the eyes and lies. When I don't hear from him, he tells me that he is on duty. I know that should not prevent him from calling me. When I was 16 years old, we took the chance and had sex, but we used protection. We rarely have sex now and he told me that he has not had sex with any other girl, although there is a girl who is in the police force who likes him and has offered herself to him. But he said that cannot do so because of me.

I am focused more on my studies and I am encouraging him to go to university also. I really love him and I would like us to get married. I don't know if he will ever stop lying. That is the only problem I have with him. I would love to hear from you on this matter.

R.L.

Dear R.L.,

Your mom got along well with your father and if your boyfriend and you love each other and the relationship is genuine, you will get along well with your boyfriend too.

You can't always believe the bad things people say about police officers; there are some good ones and some are some good Christians. They are not perfect; nobody is perfect. You say your boyfriend lies a lot; perhaps he is afraid to tell you the truth because he thinks that by telling you the truth, you would end the relationship with him.

Stay with him and hope that the time will come when both of you can get married. Your mother who has been married to your father for many years is in the position to advise you on how to deal with a policeman.

Pastor