Boyfriend’s friend keeps asking me out

Dear Pastor,

I am a 19-year-old girl and my boyfriend is also 19. He has been in America for four weeks.

We have only talked four times for the month and the conversations have not been long. I told him that I missed him and he said he will be home soon. I asked him if he saw any girl in America that he liked and he said no, he has not been concentrating on that. My friends told me that he must be lying, but I believe he is speaking the truth. He told me I am special.

The girls who are doing the same course with him are from all over America. They are always asking about Jamaica and they say they would like to visit, but he is not in love with any of them. Since he has been away, one of his friends has been inviting me out, but I haven't gone with him. He told me that my boyfriend doesn't have to know that we went out. I told him that he is not a good friend to try to get me to go out with him.

I know that I cannot tell my boyfriend that the guy invited me out. He would be very upset. My boyfriend should be back very soon and I am dying to see him. But I do not want him to keep this guy as his friend, because a good friend shouldn't want to take away his friend's girlfriend.

Initials Withheld.

Dear Writer,

Your boyfriend will soon be back. You have spoken to him often enough; and while you would want to talk to him every day, that is not possible.

Concerning his friend who has invited you out, you have already told him that you do not believe that it is appropriate for both of you to go out together. Ignore him.

Don't give your boyfriend the impression that this man wanted to have an intimate relationship with you; he did not say that. He only invited you out and you turned down his invitation. Let the matter rest. Perhaps the young man has something else in mind, but he didn't say it.

Pastor