Son of fallen cop finds comfort in visits to his grave

Whenever little Xahir Ellis disappears from the sight of his mother or grandmother, he can often be found heading to his father's grave behind his grandmother's house in St Mary.

Although he's only three years old, the tiny tot has always known the location of his father's final resting place, and whenever he can, he seeks comfort there.

"We don't allow him to go down there on his own, but if you watch him closely, he's always heading in that direction. His grandmother always says, 'Don't let him go down there. Stop him.' But he just goes straight to his daddy's grave," said his mother, Moneisha Tate.

Tate, who was in a seven-year relationship with Constable Shackeal 'Rick' Ellis, shared that the loss of her partner, who passed away unexpectedly on March 21, has been especially hard on their young son.

"He isn't talking fluently like a three-year-old should, but he looks at his pictures and he says, 'Papa' or 'Daddy' and when he goes to his grandma, where his father's room is, he always goes to the room. If the door is closed, he knocks the door and say 'Dada.' Or if it's open he goes in there looking for him, but because he doesn't see him, he just comes back out," Tate said as her eyes filled with tears.

On Tuesday, Tate and little Xahir attended the annual Commissioner's Luncheon for the Children of Fallen Officers, an event that honours and supports families who have lost loved ones in the Jamaica Constabulary Force, particularly those who passed away in 2023. Tate told THE STAR that Ellis was a devoted father who viewed his son as his ultimate pride and joy.

"He would always talk about Xai - that's what he called him. Everything is Xai and how he wants to make money for Xai and Xai this and Xai that. Everything about him is Xai. He was one of the best dads ever," Tate said.

She added that although she tries not to dwell on her loss, in an attempt to stay strong for her son, nothing could have prepared her for the pain she's endured over the past eight months.

"I really miss him," Tate said, her voice breaking as tears streamed down her cheeks. "He was kind and jovial. If you ask anybody about Rick they would tell you there is never a dull moment around him."

At Tuesday's event, Xahir played with other children who had experienced similar loss, while Tate connected with others who understood her pain, finding comfort and support in their shared experiences.

"He (Xahir) doesn't really understand what death is, so I don't tell him daddy is dead. But it's really important to me that he never forgets his father. So, apart from the pictures, sometimes I play videos for him, and I tell him, 'This is Daddy. Look, Daddy is here.' And sometimes he laughs, which makes me feel a bit better," Tate said.