Counsellor warned us about young women

Dear Pastor,

I am a 22-year-old male and I am very active in the young people's movement of our church.

Each week, there are about 20 of us who gather, but there are many more girls than guys. Recently we had a counsellor as our guest speaker. We had a rap session and he said certain things that surprised all of us. He told us that although we are Christians, we should not trust each other. We were all shocked when he said that because that is contrary to what we have been taught. He added that some women have innocent looks on their faces but they are very bad and some men are the same.

This counsellor is now married, but he said it took him a long while to find a partner because all the girls he met had sex with other guys and one of them even gave him a sexually transmitted disease. Before he had sex with her, she told him that she was always very careful with men. But she was a liar. It was only after he threatened her that she told him the truth. This girl regularly had sex, but looking at her, one would not know that she was living that type of life. He ended the relationship with her and married an older woman. People asked him why he married such an older woman and he tells them all the time, that a man is safer to have an older woman in his life.

Some of the women in the group said we must never invite him back because he does not respect young women, and he should not use his experience to discriminate against younger women.

L.M.

Dear L.M.,

There are many young girls who have not had multiple lovers. They have kept themselves well and they are clean.

It is unfortunate that this man dated one who used to play around and she caught a disease and passed it on to him. But he should know that not all women are like that. So in a real sense he insulted the young women in the group. The young women should just wish him well and hope that the older woman to whom he got married would be faithful to him and he would be faithful to her.

He should not have said that young girls should not be trusted. He is not a wise counsellor.

Pastor