Boyfriend not planning my birthday how I want

Dear Pastor,

I will be 21 in August and my boyfriend is 22. He is planning to take me to Negril for my birthday weekend.

It is something I am looking forward to. I have always wanted my 21st birthday to be special. I wanted to have a few friends with me, but my boyfriend said that that evening should be special for the both of us and no one else.

I told him that he is selfish and that we can enjoy a dinner with some of my closest friends and spend the rest of the time alone. I have not yet convinced him that that is the way we should go. He likes to have his own way. But that day is mine, and I am trying to get him to understand that he should allow me to decide how I wish to spend the day.

What kind of suggestion can you give to me for that day?

B.J.

Dear B.J.,

You are putting me on the spot. I suppose you can have a very luxurious birthday that you can afford.

So the question should be how much can you afford. You should work with your boyfriend. Both of you should do the planning together. Some of the things you can plan are, to go clubbing, host a hotel pool party, do a birthday spa, or a boat ride.

There are hotels you can call to get ideas of the types of packages that are available, and there are groups that would assist you in planning a very good birthday weekend. Just bear in mind that you should not foolishly spend all your money on a 21st birthday event. Remember that after the weekend is over, you do not want to find yourself heavily in debt.

Before I go, let me mention that some people do ask their guests to contribute to their birthday by giving gifts.

Pastor