Ashamed my Christian mother believes in obeah

Dear Pastor,

I want to know if it's just me or if other persons have experienced similar issues.

One evening I came from work and I just felt like crying because I am sick and tired of my mother. I never knew someone could have grown to despise their parents so much, especially their mother. My mother has been bathing with certain things, I don't even know what they are called, and boiling certain bushes and saying that they are teas. These things smell awful. My stomach gets really upset and I often feel that I want to vomit.

Whenever she uses these things, it makes the house smell stink, and keep in mind that we share the kitchen and the bathroom. So, at all times I have to be walking around and spraying the whole house with air freshener and opening the windows and doors. I have to stay in my room and close my door to avoid smelling what she is using. As soon as she gets up in the morning, she starts to make noise and argue over simple things. She is very miserable. Sometimes I feel like I would curse her but I have to remember that she is my mother.

My mother said demons are in the house and people are fighting against her. Every day she is saying that people are working obeah on her and she claims to be a Christian. She goes to church sometimes; she says the pastor of the church is a "reader man". I don't know if he is giving her things to bathe with and to drink. She also tells her friends what they should use to bathe and drink and they tell her to use different things. How could a person who says she believes in God think like this?

I don't want to leave the house and rent somewhere, but I have thought about it and I want to build a house for myself. But to leave now and pay rent would slow me down. Last year, I started to build a section on my mother's house so I don't have to interact with her. But to build costs a lot, and I just can't stand living in this house anymore.

T.F.

Dear T.F.,

Judging by what you have written, your mother does not seem to have peace of mind.

She believes that evil people are making life miserable for her by trying to obeah her. It is indeed very sad that she is wasting her money to purchase ointments and certain types of bush to bathe. She is not alone in doing these things. Many people purchase different oils or powders to use while they are having their baths. I was informed on the Dear Pastor Show that there is a certain store in downtown Kingston where one can go and purchase these items.

You say your mother's pastor is a reader man; you believe that he has got her to believe that demons are in her house. I can see that you believe that this man is leading your mother astray. I am glad that up to now you have been able to show her respect and not be rude to her. But, for your own comfort, I would suggest that you rent a small apartment and move out. It would indeed be costly, but you will have peace of mind. Kindly do so soon. Perhaps if you have been making your contributions to the National Housing Trust (NHT), you should check the agency for guidance. The NHT will tell you when you can apply for a house.

Pray for your mother.

Pastor