Former pole dancer builds life of success

Arneilia Parrish knows what it is like to hit rock bottom. Pregnant twice as a teenager, skipping classes, running away from home, and spending years as an exotic dancer -- her story could have ended there.

However, at 31, the mother of three has transformed her life, trading platform boots for the cap of a proud business owner.

"I am proud of the woman I have become," Parrish declared during an interview with THE WEEKEND STAR earlier this week.

As the owner of the online-based Neilia Variety Store, she's using her hard-earned wisdom to inspire young women to take control of their futures.

"Don't follow the crowd," she urged. "There is more to life than partying, and the fandangles nah carry yuh go anywhere. I was once a troubled teenager just heading down the wrong path. When I couldn't get my own way, I would mash up the people dem place and run away for days. There was a time when my mother threatened to send me to approved school."

Growing up in Portmore, St Catherine, Parrish faced a tumultuous adolescence. By the age of 20, she was a mother of two. Despite her mother's unwavering support, including sending her to nursing school and finding her jobs, Parrish struggled to find her footing.

"I got pregnant back-to-back. My mother was disappointed because she had high hopes for me. I yielded to peer pressure and was just being disobedient. I wasn't mature, even though I had two children at the time," she said.

Parrish admitted that she left most of the parenting responsibilities to her mother and grandmother while she partied and spent time with her children's father. Her destructive behaviour eventually led her to bartending and exotic dancing, a life she described as both challenging and eye-opening.

"I tried to hide it from my mother, but eventually someone from her workplace came to the club and saw me. I worked the bar and the pole, but I would just tell people I was a bartender. It was hard, and there were a lot of fights. I never sold my body, so I made less money than some of the other girls. But, once a girl thought you were making more money than her, then it was a problem," Parrish reasoned.

After nearly five years in the strip club scene, Parrish reached a turning point. Tired of seeing her mother's disappointment and wanting to set a better example for her children, she decided to walk away.

"I started to feel really bad because I knew my mother didn't approve of this lifestyle, even though she didn't fully know what I did. I have a daughter, and she emulates me. I knew I wasn't setting the right example, so I just told myself I was going to quit. Mi have three children now, and mi know mi just have to let go certain things because my children are watching me," she said.

Using savings from her previous life, Parrish ventured into retail, inspired by female relatives who were vendors.

"I saved as much as I could, rented my little house, and bought my furniture dem. Mi start mi little business, mi rent bar and throw mi little partner. Mi just turn mi life around. Mi nuh have the bar anymore, but the online store is doing its thing. I am not looking back to where I am coming from," she said.

Today, her business is thriving after three years. She wants young women to know that it is never too late to rewrite their story.

"I want them to know they can change," she said. "Life isn't about following the crowd. You can build something good for yourself, and you can be proud of who you become," she said.