Can’t stand being away from my husband

Dear Pastor,

I am 25 years old and my husband is 24. We met at a birthday event. Our eyes were glued on each other.

It was love at first sight. I used to hear people say how they experienced love at first sight, but I did not believe it. When I was taken home that night, I was still looking at the guy that I had met. Soon after I changed my clothes, I called him. He told me that he was just preparing to call me, and to tell me how he felt about me. We chatted until we fell asleep. I knew when he fell asleep because I could hear his heavy breathing.

Another day after I got home from work, I called the guy and asked him how his day was. He said everything went alright, but he would call me later on; and he did. Two years have now passed and this man and I are closer than before. Some people have told me that it is not love - it is infatuation. But if it is not love, I like how it feels. I have had boyfriends in the past, but no man has ever thrilled me like this man. He lives with his parents, and I live with mine. He has never asked me for anything, and I have never asked him for any financial help. We do not have children.

I have a concern, though. He is planning to leave the country for two years to further his studies, and I do not know whether I would be able to deal with this separation. But I am hoping that the separation might cause us to grow stronger. Being away from each other for two years would be very long. I am wondering what I could do without him. This is a perfect match; this is not infatuation, as some people may think. What are your comments?

O.D.

Dear O.D.,

Contrary to what most people believe, my position is that people can experience love at first sight.

One can see a man or woman for the first time and fall in love, and after many days there is no desire to end that relationship. Remember, love is having a special desire towards another person. If meeting together for the first time meant something special, it can be that way until they die. That special relationship does not have to be spoiled. True love is forever. But true love does not mean that a couple cannot have disagreements.

A man told me some years ago that he and his wife had been together for 25 years and they never had a disagreement. I said in my heart, 'What a boring relationship that must be.' I did not say that to him, but that is how I saw it. The Bible does not talk about a man loving his wife perfectly, or a wife loving her husband perfectly. But living and loving each other is something that couples must aspire to do.

Allow this man to go and do his course of studies. Two years is not a long time. If both of you are in love, you will remain faithful to each other. All the best. I wish you well.

Pastor