Husband got my sister pregnant

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you about my situation, and I hope that you can be of help to me. Every day I am getting older, and I am telling myself that maybe there is no hope for me.

I am 31 years old and I have two children. Their father and I are no longer together. I used to love this man so much, but he got mixed up with another woman, and even made matters worse by getting involved with my sister.

I forgave him for becoming sexually involved with other women, but I haven't gotten over his affair with my sister. She was staying with us. I was helping her to go back to school and he used to pick her up in the evenings and bring her home. I thought nothing about that until one day I borrowed his phone and realised that my sister was calling him and leaving messages for him.

I became suspicious of one message. I asked her about it and she could not give me a straight answer. I told her to be careful what she was doing and she said, "I do not need to be afraid of anything." I asked him why my sister had to tell him so and so, and he stumbled in giving me a straight answer, too. I decided that I would watch them. I saw her with an expensive gold chain and she told me that it was her boyfriend who bought it for her. But when I saw her boyfriend, he denied that. So I went back to my sister, and she had to admit that it was my husband who bought the chain. I asked her why she had to lie and she, said she was afraid to tell me the truth.

Right now my sister is pregnant by my husband. She did not wait for me to tell her to go. She packed up her stuff and left. Then he told me that she was the one who was always begging him to make love to her. So I asked him why he never told me about that; he said he could not tell me. I don't believe my sister nor my husband. Before my sister started to live with us, I saw condoms in my husband's jacket pocket and he denied they were his.

People used to tell me that they saw my husband in different places with women. So now my husband will have a child with my sister, and I have two children with him.

A.S.

Dear A.S.,

It seems to me that you put cheese into puss mouth. You were aware that your husband was a wild man. You heard that he was always having affairs with other women, and yet you brought your own sister into the house to live with you.

Now I am not excusing your husband for becoming sexually involved with your sister. He should have had more respect for you. What I am saying is that he should have been more careful. Your sister should have reported him to you when she realised that they were becoming interested in each other. As her older sister, she should have told you that she didn't like the interest he was showing in her.

She lied about the relationship. She knew that the chain that she received was not from her boyfriend, but from your husband. There is no doubt in my mind that this girl fell in love with your husband. I understand why you say that you cannot forgive him for what he has done, and you will find it very difficult to forgive your sister, also.

I am also sorry for your parents, because it will be known in the near future that your husband is the father of your sister's child. I hope that she will continue to go to school after she has given birth. I wish her well.

Pastor