Mom caught me masturbating in my room

Dear Pastor,

I am 18 and I am living with my parents. My father is hardly at home because of his job.

My brother and I share room, but he is a policeman and he is not always at home. I am in school, but I have plenty of time on my hands, so I am on the computer and I like to go on these x-rated channels. I have a girlfriend, but her parents are very strict, so we only meet once per week. We have had sex a few times, but I don't always have money to give to her to help her out, so I masturbate a lot. One day my mother said she heard noise as if somebody was in the room with me, but I had the computer turned up too loud and I was masturbating. I did not hear my mother coming in, but she opened the room and saw what I was looking at. I was naked. My mother told me to turn off the computer.

Pastor, I was ashamed because my mother saw me masturbating. When my father came home, she told him what she saw and what I was doing. My father did not condemn me. He asked me how often I had to masturbate and I hesitated and he said he was a man so I should not tell him any lies. So, I told him often and he asked if I don't have sex with my girlfriend. I told him no. I did not want to tell my father the truth about her. My mother asked my father what he was going to do about me and he said he can't do anything. My mother threatened to take away the computer, but my father told her that she was talking foolishness. My father walked away and told my mother that it was better for me to masturbate than to go out and get a girl pregnant.

When my brother got home, my mother told him what she saw me doing and he made a big joke about it and he called me a fool to have the room door unlocked. He said I should remember that my mother doesn't have to knock on the door when she is coming in to our room. I still look on the x-rated channel and I still masturbate. Do you think I am harming myself by masturbating ?

G.H.

Dear G.H.,

I can understand how you embarrassed yourself by enjoying the habit that you have developed and allowing your mother to see you doing so.

I would not condemn you for masturbating because it is something that both men and women do. Your mother was shocked to see you playing with yourself, so she questioned you and reported you to your father. But she went further by threatening to take away your computer. Your father knows that she was going to the extreme and your brother made a big joke about it.

What you are doing will not hurt you and your father is correct; it is better for you to masturbate than to go out and have sex with women and get them pregnant. The day may come when you will get married and the urge to masturbate will lessen. So, remember now, whenever there is an urge for you to masturbate, make sure you have absolute privacy.

Pastor